Shadow on the Sun
by Janis 70
Summary: AU (All Human) Life for Buffy and Angel was a happy one. Until it was turned upside down by an unforeseeable event that threatens to tear them apart for good. Will the love between Buffy and Angel be enough to help them move forward? Or will they leave each other stranded, despite their undying love? (Buffy/Angel)
1. Author's Note

**Author's Note:**

Hey ya'll!

This one has been buzz-buzzing around my head for a long while now and I think I finally found a way to get down in 'story form'.

It's gonna be a... well... it's a complicated one but I think enjoyable!

Until then…

-Oh! Pay close attention to the "Present-Day"/"Flashback" sequences... I tried to keep it simple and easy to follow.

 **Peace and Love,**

 _ **P.S. Leave a review! I value your opinion!**_

 _ **P.S.S. Fun Fact: For those wondering,**_ ** _"Shadow on the Sun"_** _ ** ** _is a song by Audioslave, 2002_****_

 _ **P.S.S.S. I swear I didn't forget about my unfinished stories...!**_


	2. Chapter 1

**Prologue**

 **Sunnydale, California**

 **O'Connor Residence**

" _Buffy, we gotta go!_ "

As a response to the impatient deep voice calling out to her from down the stairs, Buffy released a heavy breath as she stepped out of the bedroom, closing the door behind her.

She knew how agitated her husband was feeling, while she took her time fixing her earring and taking one more look at herself before descending down the stairs.

" _Buf!_ "

Rolling her eyes, she flicked the bathroom light off and continued down the hallway towards the stairs.

* * *

Angelus O'Connor—or Angel, as his wife of almost five years affectionately calls him, sat on the edge of the couch tying white shoelaces. He lifted his dark eyes to meet a pair of light brown eyes with green specks around the pupil. A tugging smile crossed Angelus's mouth falling in love with his four and a half-year-old son all over again.

"Please, try not to roll around the dirt this time," Angelus told the boy. "I don't want to hear about it from your mother."

"Can I still play outside?" The child asked.

Angelus pulled the shoelace loops tight and said, "Of course, just avoid the mud."

"Can I have a hotdog?"

"I'm sure your grandmother is making hotdogs," Angelus replied.

The boy sat for a moment in thought. Angelus' smile widened as the boy scrunched his face in a familiar way his wife often did when she was thinking about something long and hard.

The boy's eyes brightened, "Can I have a cookie?"

"I don't see why not. I'm sure someone made cookies—Probably your Aunt Dawn."

"Can I have ice cream?" The boy stuck out his bottom lip in a pout which was identical to his mother's.

Angelus laughed and cupped his hands around the child's little face. "Do you want cookies _on_ the ice cream?"

The boy nodded his head with a wide grin.

The clacks of sandals hitting the bottom wooden stair turned Angelus's attention.

He looked over at Buffy and smirked, "Finally." Angelus began to stand just as the four and a half-year-old jumped off of the coffee table and ran straight to Buffy.

Already anticipating the excited child, Buffy bent down and opened her arms for the boy to jump into them.

"Oof, my little pumpkin-belly isn't so little anymore… What's up with that?" Buffy eyed her son as he curiously played with her necklace.

The child shrugged his small shoulders and lifted his eyes to Buffy's. He flashed her a toothy smile that melted Buffy's insides with love.

"You look pretty, Mommy."

"Thank you, baby." Buffy gently kissed his little pert nose. "You look handsome. I'm glad, Daddy was able to help you get dressed." She turned her eyes across the room to Angelus, giving him a knowing look.

Angelus frowned, "I can certainly dress our son, Buf." He told her confidently then stuffed his hands into his pockets, "Right after _you_ caught him running around in his underwear and started dressing him—But then _I_ took over and… it all worked out."

Giving him a smile, Buffy shook her head, "Yes, thank you, honey."

"We should get going, we're already late," Angelus said as he moved to the front door and picked up the _Jeep Cherokee_ keys from the bowl near the door and picked up a large brown bag carrying a large pasta salad.

"Jeez, lighten up, Angel, we're just going to my mothers."

Angelus frowned, "Yeah, and I know your mother and she'll blame _me_ for us being late."

"You're being paranoid, Mom _loves_ you." Buffy stepped towards him and craned her neck up to meet his lips halfway.

Still, in Buffy's arms, their son let out a boyish giggle and buried his face into Buffy's neck.

Smiling against her lips, Angelus knew he could easily fall into the vortex of her perfect mouth. Possibly more than the sound of her voice and the colour of her eyes, Angelus loved kissing his wife. He loved the softness of her lips, the taste of her lipgloss, the gentleness of her tongue as it caressed his tongue.

Opening his dark eyes, Angelus nuzzled his nose against hers and pushed her long blonde curled hair behind her ear. "We _definitely_ have to go."

Returning his smile, Buffy nodded, "Definitely."

Opening the front door, Angelus gestured for Buffy to exit the home first and he would follow.

They lived in a modest craftsman style house in the suburban town of Sunnydale, which was just outside of Los Angeles. After the divorce between Buffy's mother, Joyce and her father, Hank, Joyce moved her and her two daughters from the bustling city in an attempt to start anew.

Buffy finished high school at Sunnydale High and decided to attend UC Sunnydale. It was not until her last year of college and an internship for a prestigious art gallery of modern and contemporary art when she met Angelus. He was not an artist or an art enthusiast, though he had a great talent for life drawing. At the time, Angelus was the newest CEO of the esteemed law firm, _Wolfram & Hart. _The law firm had been left for him to take over after the passing of his grandfather. He only went to the art gallery showing to keep an eye on his attorneys as they catered to the law firm's distinguished clientele.

But all of his thoughts were muddled as soon as his eyes landed on _her_ from across the room.

 **4 ¾ Years Ago**

 **ArtSquare Warehouse**

He didn't have a single interest in the art world. He never cared about it or thought it about it much, until he decided to become invested in it; after seeing the client profit between the gallery, artists, and buyers.

Now, Angelus stood at the centre of an art gallery, surrounded by the loudest, most colourful, and eccentric group of people he's ever seen assembled in one area.

After living in Los Angeles for some time, Angelus was no stranger to the various _characters_ that surfaced functions such as this, but the overwhelming amount of _artists_ and ridiculously wealthy buyers left him flabbergasted.

Glancing down at his watch around his wrist, Angelus lifted his eyes spotting a golden blonde head of long hair. He instantly felt drawn to the colour, even after never seeing the woman's face. Despite his distance from the golden-haired woman, Angelus knew she was petite, he guessed she probably came up to his chest if that. She was thin but shapely he noted as his eyes ran down the length of her petite thin body.

Without him realising, Angelus found himself walking towards her.

Standing closely behind her, Angelus closed his eyes and breathed in her floral perfume. His senses tingled and the feminine scent was now engraved into his membrane.

The golden-haired woman felt a presence behind her and slowly turned to face the stranger.

A breath hitched in her throat and her eyes lifted to his face. Never in her life had she ever seen a man so handsome. His features were dark, almost sinister but she could easily recognise a genuine soulful softness in his dark brown eyes. His lips were fixed in a permanent slanted smile.

For the first time in Angelus's life, he felt his heart skip a beat and felt himself fall into the depths of her welcoming green eyes.

"Hi," he finally found his voice but inwardly slapped himself for sounding like a buffoon.

A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth, which brightened her entire face, "Hi."

From that moment, Angelus was head over heels in love with this beautiful golden-haired woman, he didn't even know her name yet.

 **Present-Day**

Angelus stood behind Buffy as she fixed the straps of the car seat around their son.

He watched with a slanted smile across his face as Buffy stood straight and lovingly ran her fingers through the boy's short dark hair.

Taking her by her hand as she stepped away and closed the backseat door, Angelus' hands were on her hips pressing her back against the car. Wordlessly, Buffy's arms circled around Angelus' neck and her fingers twirled the small hairs at the nape of his neck.

Nuzzling her nose, Angelus smiled as his lips gently touched hers.

"At this rate, we're definitely going to be late," Buffy mumbled against his mouth.

"You're right," his smile grew then closed the millimetre space between their mouths with another knee buckling, insides-melting kiss.

His unhurried kiss was much deeper with a mixture of passion and desperate need. Angelus slipped his tongue between her lips and gently dulled with hers. Buffy's hands slipped from the nape of his neck and over his shoulders to his biceps.

Desperate to catch her breath, Buffy broke the kiss and touched her forehead against his, "Okay, we _definitely_ have to go now."

A low chuckle rumbled in Angelus' chest. He touched the line of her jaw with the backs of his fingers and whispered, "I love you."

"I love you," she whispered back, feeling her stomach do a familiar flip-flop and her heart pound. This was a reaction she had every time he whispered those three little words. She knew he meant them.

Opening the passenger side door behind her, Angelus bent down his head chastely pecking her lips before forcibly removing himself, otherwise, he knew they'd end up kissing again and they would absolutely be late.

"I'm removing myself now," Angelus grinned and ran his hands from her elbows to her hands.

Buffy kissed his chin with a teasing smile, "Good idea."

Finally, making the effort to remove himself from his greatest temptation, Angelus stepped away from his adoring wife and walked around the _Jeep_ to the driver's side door.

* * *

Turning the key in the ignition, Angelus turned over his eyes to Buffy and tossed her a wolfish smile.

Reading his mind, Buffy arched her brow telepathically reminding him they were on their way to her mother's.

Suddenly, Angelus' smile dropped from his face and put the car into reverse and backed out of the driveway.

"Who wants to listen to _Disney_ songs?" Buffy asked looking back at the four and a half-year-old clapping his hands and wildly grinning with excitement.

* * *

Heading into the direction towards the quickest route to Joyce's house, Angelus laughed to the happy sounds of the four and a half-year-old singing in the backseat to a _Lion King_ song.

The _Jeep_ slowly crept up to the stop sign at the four-way intersection heading towards Sunnydale's Main Street.

Buffy turned back to the backseat and ran her hand over the boy's tiny leg then gave his little ankle a squeeze before sitting straight again.

Angelus stepped off the brake pedal after determining it was safe to cross the intersection.

Having the right of way, the _Jeep_ began to cross the intersection.

Noticing a dark coloured object speeding down the street, Buffy turned her head and her eyes widened and cried out Angelus' name just as the _Ford F-150_ barrelled into the left side of the _Jeep_ without slowing down, blowing through the stop sign.

The _Jeep_ flipped over landing on the roof.

Angelus opened his eyes and realised he was still alive. He felt the blood from his nose slip up his face and seep into his eyes. He knew it was still light out but the inside of the mangled and smoky car confused his mind, making it appear dark. He looked over to his right and saw, Buffy, knocked out, bloody, battered, and bruised. She hung limp, her seatbelt strapped around her chest, keeping her firmly in the passenger's seat.

His eyes felt heavy as the blood rushed to his brain making him dizzy. Angelus made an attempt to look back to the car seat but the injuries to his torso prevented him from moving. He gritted his teeth and felt his body go limp as the world around him turned black.

 **Sunnydale Hospital**

 **ICU Room**

Her mind was fogged as she started to come to.

She felt a slight pressure on her forearm and hand but could not connect the familiar tingle shiver shooting through her body to her mind. Her body felt like she had been beaten down with a sledgehammer.

Her eyes slowly opened.

The room she was in was bright, which was a severe shock to her senses. Her heart pounded confused of where she was and what had happened. Her memory was jagged and broken. She remembered leaving the house in the _Jeep_ and children songs.

Her blurry vision slowly focused on the familiar colour of dark brown spiky hair. She knew who was holding her hand tightly and laying on her forearm.

"Angel?" Her throat felt raw and dry as if she hadn't spoken in weeks.

Angelus picked up his head and the look of relief in his eyes struck her with surprise. He brought the hand he held to his lips and with his other hand, he pushed back her blonde hair, careful to avoid the large white bandage covering the gash across her forehead.

"I'm here," he gently whispered.

Her green eyes focused on his face noticing the reddened bruises over his high cheekbone and the cut over his left brow. She lowered her gaze to her hand that he held and frowned at the white bandage wrapped around his palm.

"What happened?"

Swallowing his emotions, Angelus replied, "There was an accident… a truck hit us."

Closing her eyes as she processed the news. Buffy saw the warped images of her memory of the accident. As if it was in slow motion, she remembered looking back to the car seat with a large smile, listening to her four and a half-year-old sing. She then remembered turning her eyes to the passenger's window to see the front grill of the _Ford F-150_ impaling the side of the car.

"Matthew…" she opened her eyes again and looked around with a mother's worry. "Where's Matthew?" Buffy didn't see him in the room with them and then thought he could be in the children's wing.

Buffy started to get out of the hospital bed, ignoring the searing aches of her body.

"Buffy…"

She paid no mind to her husband as she was determined to see her son. "Where's Matthew?" She looked at him, terrified.

With dark eyes of heartbreak, Angelus swallowed and slowly lifted his eyes to her face.

Never needing him to explain, Buffy felt herself crumble. Tears blurred her vision and fell from her eyes and down her cheeks. "No," her chin quivered. She shook her head in disbelief and covered her mouth with her bandaged hand.

Angelus reached out to her but she pulled away from his touch. Understanding her heartache and withdraw, Angelus quietly explained, "They did everything they could."

Drawing her knees into her chest, ignoring the pain it caused and hugging her arms around herself, Buffy was unable to stop the tears.

Angelus moved to sit on the edge of the bed wrapping his arms around her frail body, ignoring her attempts to free herself. She buried her face into his chest and sobbed. Angelus buried his nose into her blonde hair, unable to fight the tears now falling from his eyes.

Sitting together on the ICU hospital bed, they held each other.

* * *

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	3. Chapter 2

**3 Years Later**

 **Los Angeles, California**

 **Orchard Archive**

Standing at the centre of the biggest night in the contemporary fine arts, Buffy was surrounded by ambitious investors, starving artists, and the social elites.

Holding a glass of Champaign, Buffy listened with an easy smile to the man beside her as he gave his juxtaposed opinion about the sculpture placed in front of them. With politeness, Buffy did not interrupt, finding his ideas fascinatingly insane. The sculpture was of an open can of beans with a worm coming out of it, it was not hard to understand its 'hidden' meaning.

In the last three years, Buffy had become a rising star in the art community. She finally owned her own art gallery in the upcoming area of LA, which the millennial generation latched onto, making it the 'place to be'.

Her business struck gold after working with Faith Lehane, an eccentric painter known as a controversial figure in the art world. The two were a match made in heaven, both easily profiting off of one another.

Working with Faith opened many doors for Buffy to book the biggest upcoming names in art from across the globe.

Buffy began to gain popularity outside of the art community, magazines wanted to interview the rising entrepreneur. _Composure_ magazine, known to be a women's magazine which talked about fashion, sex, romance, fitness took an interest in the Californian native.

The popular LA-based magazine fought tooth and nail to have a sit down with the gallery owner. Finally, after months of persistent nagging, Buffy agreed to the cover issue article and invited the main columnist to the _Orchard Archive_ exhibit in hopes to make a definite date to sit down.

"Can you believe these people are gushin' over a can of worms?"

Buffy smiled and turned her gaze to the dark-haired woman beside her. "People call it art, Faith. You should recognise its obscurity."

"I mean, I'm all about the obscure. I made an entire living out of the obscure," Faith frowned, cocking her brow at the sculpture, "but this is just crap—Pure, smelly crap."

Unable to argue against it, Buffy let out a laugh and tossed her eyes around the crowded room.

"No sign of the columnist?" Faith asked.

Buffy shrugged, "I don't know—mostly because, I have no idea what she looks like. I've never actually read, _Composure_ magazine."

"Really? Isn't fashion like a hobby of yours or something?"

Rolling her eyes, Buffy shook her head, " _Shopping_ is the hobby but I've always been a _Cosmo_ kind of girl."

"Well, _Composure_ is the fastest growing women's magazine in the country."

Failing to mask her surprise, Buffy eyed her friend with amusement.

Faith frowned, "What?—I can read things on the internet too. What I'm tryin' to say—which isn't comin' out right—big shocker there… What I'm tryin' to say is that… I'm happy for you, B. You deserve this."

"Thank you," Buffy never liked high compliments and disliked them more so when they came from an unusual source. Faith was not known to be an affectionate or a warm person. There was a cynical darkness inside of her which Buffy connected to and thus began an easy but complicated friendship.

"I'm gonna go find Glory. I've got a new collection ready to go. She can send someone to pick it up tomorrow or whatever…" Faith strained herself, looking over the heads of the crowd to find Buffy's beautiful curly haired blonde assistant wearing a tight red dress.

"Last I saw, she was with talking to some guy but the living room sculptures."

Faith frowned and looked back down at the petite woman, "Living room sculptures? Am I at an art show or _Ikea_?" She shook her head as she headed towards the assistant across the gallery flirting.

Buffy smiled to herself and moved her eyes back around the room when they landed on a familiar handsome face of a man with dark features and alluring chocolate brown eyes.

Buffy stared at the man with surprise and couldn't think as he walked over to her.

"What are you doing here?" Buffy asked, unable to keep the slight bitterness from her shocked voice.

Angelus stuffed his hands into his pockets. "Its good to see you, too."

"Why are you here, Angel?"

He opened his mouth to respond when she cut him off. "—And don't say its because you're suddenly such a fan of art." She rolled her eyes, knowing him well.

With a deepening frown, Angelus said, "I wasn't gonna say that."

"New clients?"

"Buffy…" his deep velvet voice rumbled through her body, despite the loud noise of chattering and music around her.

Shaking her head, Buffy began to step away from him, "I can't do this."

Out of a force of habit, Angelus reached out his hand, catching her wrist. She turned back to him, unable to fight the longing in her heart.

Angelus' hand loosely held her wrist and slowly fell to her hand. He took another step towards her, breathing in the familiar scent of her perfume. His closed heart reopened as it poured love and desperate longing for her.

Lifting her eyes to his face, Buffy wanted to do nothing more than to fall into him and feel his protective arms held her tightly.

"Buffy—" "Buffy—" Angelus and another man called out her name.

Angelus snapped his eyes to a man with friendly blue eyes and clean-cut light brown hair. Angelus immediately noticed the distress on Buffy's face but kept his gaze firmly on the strange man.

Standing just a few inches taller than Angelus, Riley Finn stuck out his free hand as the other held a tiny plate of hors-d'oeuvres. "I'm Riley." He said with a smile.

Accepting his offered hand, Angelus tuned his eyes from Riley to Buffy, slightly shaking his head with disappointment.

"Angelus," he reverted his eyes back to Riley's smiling face.

"Nice to meet you," Riley said.

Curiously, Angelus sat back on his heels and eyed the All-American looking man and said, "What do you do, Riley?"

"I'm an Army Major stationed at the base outside of Sunnydale. You've heard of that town?"

With a sneering smirk, Angelus nodded, "I've been through it once or twice." His gaze briefly went back to Buffy for a moment.

Uncomfortable with this entire situation, Buffy wanted nothing more than to walk away but she knew it would draw Riley's suspicion and she wasn't doing that great of a job already from masking her rising emotions.

Pressing on with the conversation, Angelus asked, "How do you know, Buffy? She's never mentioned a… boyfriend."

Glaring at him, Buffy pursed her lips together wanting him to shut his mouth.

"Fiancé—actually," Riley said, much to Angelus' shock.

His smirking face dropped with a flash of pain in his eyes. He looked at Buffy and knew it was true by the look of guilt withering her green eyes. Angelus turned his gaze to the diamond ring that sat on her left-hand ring finger.

"Did you meet that columnist?" Riley asked oblivious to the painful heartache between the pair.

Shaking herself from her guilt, Buffy cleared her throat and shook her head, "No, not yet—"

"—Oh, there you are."

All eyes turned to a gorgeous woman with dark modelesque features. Her hair was long chestnut coloured. She stood taller than Buffy. Her body was attractively curvy and wore the form-fitting minidress splendidly.

"Sweetie, I thought I lost you." The woman wrapped her arm around Angelus' arm.

Buffy looked at Angelus with a straining gaze.

"Are you Buffy Summers?" The gorgeous woman looked at Buffy with hopefulness.

Shaking her shock, Buffy nodded, "Guilty."

"Oh, thank God, you are one hard woman to track down. I ran into your assistant—you know, the attractive one with perfectly highlighted hair and flirting with a smoochable man over there—I think he's a doctor…"

Buffy swallowed severely uncomfortable, "That sounds like Glory."

"Anyway, she said, you would be over here and she was absolutely right." A thought shot into the woman's mind and held out her hand. "Oh, I'm Cordelia by the way. I'm from _Composure_ magazine. I spoke to you on the phone about the interview." Never letting Buffy digest the conversation, Cordelia went on to say, "I see you've already met my boyfriend, Angelus."

Unseen by Cordelia and Riley, Buffy's eyes shot to Angelus.

"Riley Finn," Riley held out his hand for Cordelia to take. "I'm Buffy's fiancé."

Cordelia smiled loving the juicy gossip, "And what do you do, Riley?"

"I'm in the Army."

Turning her dark eyes to Buffy, Cordelia smile widened, "Nice catch, Buffy." Her hand went to Angelus' chest and lovingly eyed her boyfriend, "My Angelus is the CEO of a _really_ famous law firm, _Wolfram & Hart—_You've heard of it." Cordelia looked at Buffy, "We _both_ caught good ones."

Unable to think straight, Buffy could only look at Angelus suddenly unsure just how everything fell apart so quickly.

* * *

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	4. Chapter 3

**Buffy's Loft**

 **Master Bedroom**

After feeling suffocated the entire rest of the evening with Angelus' cold dark eyes watching her every move and the forces of Riley and Cordelia talking at her, competing for her attention, Buffy was desperate for an escape.

Finally alone, Buffy closed the door of the master bedroom, as Riley tended to a phone call from the Army Base.

Leaning back against the wooden door, Buffy ran her hands through her hair and gasped to catch her breath.

In one fell swoop, years of rollercoaster emotions of love, heartbreak, and anger flooded Buffy. For three years she tried to move on from her past. For the moment, she thought she had been doing well. She finally found some semblance of happiness, a new man who loved her dearly, then suddenly, like a freight train, one look at Angelus and all of those years came crashing back in a heart-wrenching way.

Holding back the tears that threatened to stream down her face, Buffy pulled herself together and caught her breath.

Pushing herself from the door, Buffy crossed the large master bedroom and went into the large walk-in closet.

Moving to the tips of her toes, Buffy pushed aside various boxes out of her way on the top shelf above the racks of her clothes.

Grabbing the sides of an old box, Buffy pulled it down from the shelf and sat down on the floor, placing the medium sized box in front of her.

Swallowing her emotions, Buffy opened the lid of the box and placed it aside. She took a deep breath and reached inside taking out a medium brown coloured stuffed bear. Her throat clenched with heartbreak as she gently caressed the bear's face.

Breathing in deeply, Buffy held the bear into her chest, longing to feel her little boy in her arms again.

A small box inside the medium sized box turned Buffy's attention. Sitting the bear in the centre of her cross legs, Buffy reached inside for the small box.

She opened the lid and wanted to cry all over again.

Inside of the small box was a thin silver Claddagh ring. It was the ring Angelus had given to her as a sign of his devoted love. It was the ring of their broken marriage.

 **3 Years Ago**

 **Sunnydale, California**

 **O'Connor Residence**

 **Kitchen**

Leaning back against the counter island, Buffy spun the thin silver Claddagh ring around her finger. It was a nervous habit she barely realised she's ever done.

Her mind was on her marriage which was in the midst of crumbling around her.

After the accident almost six months ago, nothing was the same. Nothing would ever be the same, which Buffy knew. Losing their son was the worst possible thing to happen to them and it left them broken and depressed.

But after six months nothing was changing. Buffy never thought the healing process would be a quick one but there wasn't any progress towards it. Neither Buffy or Angelus had spoken about their son in months. In fact, they hardly spoke to one another at all.

Every time they started to make the attempt to reignite some sort of connection again, one of them always pulled away.

Buffy tried at the beginning to try to reconnect with Angelus but he pushed her as far away as possible or lashed out at her in heated anger. Soon her attempts lessened until they stopped altogether.

They stayed in their separate areas, co-existing in the same place but never trying to move forward together.

Noticing the little blue light from the coffee machine; indicating it was finished brewing, Buffy pushed herself from the edge of the counter island towards the coffee machine. She opened the cabinet taking out a coffee mug when the sounds of shifting furniture dragged across the wooden floor turned her attention.

She looked back with a frown and listened to the sounds of movement coming from above.

With realisation, the sounds were coming from their son's bedroom.

* * *

Walking towards the stairs, the sounds of movement coming from the bedroom became more evident.

Curiously, Buffy walked up the stairs and headed the short distance down the hallway.

Standing outside the bedroom, the door was left ajar. For months she hadn't been able to enter the bedroom. The furthest she's ever gotten was wrapping her hand around the doorknob. For months she stood outside of the bedroom, trying to force herself to finally take the steps inside.

She placed her hand on the door beside the name sign, which hung outside of it. Buffy swallowed her terror and heartache, taking a deep breath, Buffy pushed open the bedroom door wider.

Angelus' back was to her as he moved from the closet to the large brown packing boxes sitting scattered around the bedroom. He went to the nightstand and without a semblance of emotion, he tossed the nighttime storybooks, a few toys left on the nightstand and a homemade noodle frame with a photograph of the small family during happier times into the box.

Feeling as if the rug was being pulled out from under her, all Buffy could do was stare. She watched her husband, horrified by his actions as he packed up the child's bedroom.

"What are you doing?" Buffy asked, still spinning with disbelief.

Keeping his back towards her, Angelus replied, "What does it look like?"

"Stop it," her voice barely reached above a whisper.

Ignoring her whispering plea, Angelus continued to toss the four and a half-year-olds belongings into the packing box.

"Please, stop, Angel." Buffy tried desperately to hold back the tears forming in her eyes.

"It needs to be done." His reply was swift and crisp.

Angelus tossed the medium brown coloured stuffed bear, which sat on the _NASA Space_ blankets into the box.

Pushing past her fear of entering the bedroom, for the first time since the funeral, Buffy went straight to the medium brown coloured stuffed bear and took it out. She eyed it carefully then lifted her eyes to Angelus.

"Angel—"

"—Stay if you're going to help, otherwise, leave." Keeping her at a distance, Angelus did not look up at her with his glaring dark eyes but kept moving around the room.

"Angel, stop this now." She watched as he piled the child's folded clothing from the clean laundry basket into a box, "Don't touch that!" Buffy demanded, reaching out, snatching the random article of clothing from his hands. "What's the matter with you?"

"Someone's gotta do it, otherwise, it would never get done."

"Not now, Angel, it's too soon."

For the first time, Angelus stood straight and whirled around glaring at her. "Then when is it a good time, _Buffy_?"

Dumbfounded by his crassness, Buffy could only stare at her husband with wide fogged eyes, "We're not doing this now."

"Open your eyes, Buf, it's been _six months_ and he isn't coming back. Its time to move on—" his words died on his lips when her hand slapped across his face.

"You're a _son of a bitch_ ," she glared at him appalled by his harsh words, which held no emotion. "You don't think I don't know that he's _never_ coming back?"

Angelus looked at her for a moment before grabbing the box on the bed and continuing to pack the items around the child's bedroom. "It needs to be done."

"What are you going to do with his things?"

"What do you think?" Angelus said, keeping his eyes firmly on the stuffed animals going into the box. "We can't keep it, Buffy. We can't _live_ with his… _things_ gaining dust in some storage locker."

Buffy pursed her lips together and held her hands at her hip, "So what?—Are you just going to throw everything out? You're just gonna... toss the last four and a half years straight down the trash shoot?—Throw out our son?"

Angelus spun around clenching his jaw, "Don't do that. Don't you make me the bad guy in this, Buffy. At least I'm trying to move on—"

"—Yeah, by throwing Matthew's things in the _garbage!_ " Buffy grabbed a random box, which happened to contain books, toys, a photograph, and a stuffed bear from the nightstand. "No, I won't let you just… _toss_ it way. Push me away—Shut me out, I've gotten pretty damn used to that but pretending that _our son_ didn't exist… No, I _refuse_."

Angelus swallowed, holding his hands to his hips, trying to keep his voice calm though inside he was boiling with rage. "Put down the box."

"No," Buffy glared at him, holding the box tighter into her chest.

"Put… the box _down,_ Buffy." His voice was strained with impatience.

Refusing his demand, Buffy said once more, "No."

Angelus' chest heaved with rising anger. Buffy watched his dark eyes glaze over with a look she's never seen before. She didn't recognise him.

" _Put the fucking box down!_ " Angelus exploded.

" _No!_ " Buffy matched his angered voice, seemingly unafraid of his rage. "I won't let you take this, Angel!" She turned away from home, holding the packing box in her arms.

Angelus kicked aside the scattered boxes in his way, heading towards her. "Get back here, Buffy!" He commanded, reaching the bedroom doorway to see her back facing him. " _Buffy, get back here!_ "

" _Go to hell!_ " Buffy shouted over her shoulder, continuing down the hallway with a determination to keep _something_ of their son.

Almost down the stairs, Buffy paused hearing a crash from the bedroom. She looked back up the stairs hearing more crashing.

Placing the box down on the stair, Buffy cautiously walked back up the stairs and slowly walked back down the hallway.

When she reached the doorway of the bedroom, her heart nearly stopped at the sight inside the child's room.

Angelus held a wooden baseball bat he had gotten for Matthew after seeing a _Dodger's_ home game.

He whacked the wooden dresser until it broke into pieces. Angelus kicked away the broken dresser and broke the lamp on the nightstand and then the nightstand. He placed the baseball bat on the bed and began to rip the _Star Wars_ poster, _Dodger's_ logo poster, and hand-drawn pictures off of the wall. He grabbed the baseball bat and wailed on the small wooden desk nearest to the bedroom window then the shelf beside it until the baseball bat finally snapped broken.

Buffy stood in heartbroken silence as she watched her devastated husband destroy almost everything in the bedroom, anything that would remind him of his child.

Helpless to where she stood, she didn't know what to do. She knew if she tried to comfort him, he'd push her even further away and her heart couldn't take any more of that rejection.

After holding in his emotions during the entire tragedy, Angelus finally lashed out and he was erupting with anger.

Buffy watched as he began to pound his fist into the broken furniture until his knuckles were bleeding—which went ignored. There wasn't any amount of pain that could top the anguish he felt.

Knowing in time he'll calm down, Buffy held her arms around herself and slowly backed away from the bedroom. She walked back down the darkened hallway towards the stairs until she reached the box.

Ignoring the crashing of broken furniture pieces, Buffy picked up the box and continued down the stairs.

 **Present-Day**

 **Los Angeles, California**

 **Buffy's Loft**

 **Master Bedroom**

Buffy wiped away the fallen tear from her cheek and placed the Claddagh ring back into the ring back.

After that day, things had only gotten worse, Buffy and Angelus completely shut down from one another. They never spoke about Matthew until one year later.

Taking a deep breath, Buffy's ears perked at the sound of the bedroom door opening.

"Buffy?"

Quickly, Buffy placed the ring box and the stuffed bear back into the medium sized box. She got to her feet and hid the box behind a few items on the top shelf.

"Oh, there you are?" Riley said, poking his head into the walk-in closet wearing a small smile. "What are you doing in here?"

"Just…" thinking quickly, Buffy took off her designer stilettos and said, "… taking off my shoes."

Riley leaned against the closet doorway with his hands in his front pants pockets. "I think tonight went really well."

"Yeah, well…" turning away from him, Buffy placed the high heel shoes on the shelf, "… tonight wasn't about me."

"I know but…" Riley pushed himself from the doorway heading towards her, "… I like seeing you in action." He reached out taking her hands that were at her sides.

Hiding any of the lingering emotions still plaguing her heart, Buffy masked her face with an easy smile. "I'm nothing special."

"I beg to differ." He pulled her closer, touching her front against his. "Things are going really well for you, Buf. The biggest magazine wants to have a full story on you—that's awesome."

"I guess."

Riley craned his neck down and brushed his mouth over hers. " _It is_." He whispered against her lips, then kissed her once more.

Buffy released a heavy breath, trying to ignore the pang of guilt in her chest as she kissed her fiancé.

Breaking the kiss, Riley opened his eyes, watching her closely. He didn't know if she knew, but Riley noticed a whole lot more than Buffy would have expected. It didn't escape his notice to see how uncomfortable she became when talking to the attractive dark-haired man at the gallery nor the redness in her eyes right now. There was something about her entire demeanour that changed.

"Are you feeling better?" Riley suddenly asked, catching Buffy off guard.

"Excuse me?" She looked at him.

Riley ran his hands up and down her upper arms, "Back at the gallery… before I came back to _rescue_ you from that guy. You know, Cordelia's boyfriend?—You seemed a little… uncomfortable."

"I wasn't," Buffy said, almost too quickly. "I mean, he was, uh…"

"Flirting with my girl?" Riley grinned, loving the sound of his own words echoing in his head, 'his girl'.

Wanting out of this conversation, afraid it would begin some sort of argument, Riley had always felt a bit insecure when it came to other men making eyes at her. Buffy placed her hands on his chest and said, "It was nothing. Besides he has a... girlfriend," she forced out, trying to sound as if it was the most common thing in the world, but inside she was screaming. "Besides," Buffy looked up at him from under her long lashes and whispered, "I'm with you."

"I like the sound of that." Riley smiled and closed the space between their mouths in a soft kiss.

Needing a rapid end to the conversation, Buffy deepened their kiss by opening her mouth wider. She pressed her front against his solid body and her hands drift up and around his neck.

She knew she had Riley wrapped under her spell when his hands slipped down her back and held her at her sides.

Taking a few steps backwards, Riley reentered the bedroom still lip-locked in a deep and sensual kiss.

Keeping her eyes tightly closed, Buffy let her fingers unfasten the buttons of his shirt. She needed just a little while to forget the flooding of heartache and guilt, which tormented her. She needed to get herself back on track with moving forward. But her mind went back to the familiar dark brown eyes that frequently haunted her mind.

When Buffy opened her eyes again it wasn't Riley's face she was looking at anymore. Her mind felt the burn of Angelus' soulful dark eyes, which were filled with desire. She imagined his familiar hands touching her skin as they slipped the tight dress down her slim body. When Riley's mouth covered hers, she easily imagined Angelus' spicy taste; which she had ingrained in her mind the first time he ever kissed her.

Riley's arms wrapped around Buffy and backed her to the edge of the bed. He unfastened the front of his pants, mesmerised by her impatience to have him, which only fuelled his desire.

Brushing his hand away from his standing cock, Buffy's tricked mind helped her imagine Angelus. With all of the power inside of her, Buffy imagined Angelus and tried her damnedest to block the guilt that tightened in her chest.

She held her hand against Riley's cheek and looked at him. Riley never suspected that she was in-fact picturing another man, she never gave him any suspicions to think that there was anyone else that could fill her heart with a rollercoaster amount of emotions besides him.

* * *

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	5. Chapter 4

**Next Afternoon**

 **Wolfram & Hart**

 **Angelus' Office**

Sitting at his large wooden desk which was covered in files that needed his signature, Angelus sat back in his leather chair staring at a small photograph he's kept in his wallet for years.

It was a small photo of Buffy holding their newborn son closely into her. They both looked at the camera he had been holding.

They were so happy and so much in love back then. His memory of the pregnancy and his sheer panic of becoming a father was crisp in his mind. Buffy's seamless transition into motherhood inspired him to be the perfect father and husband and he tried so hard.

But he failed.

He failed _her._ As a husband and a father of their only child. He was supposed to protect his family and he failed. He needed to let her go and let her find someone else who was worthy of her love.

Angelus never told Cordelia about Buffy and the loss of their son. Granted, they haven't been seeing each other long and Angelus wasn't sure if he could completely commit to her but he decided to give it a try but then he saw _her_ again.

After three years of forcing himself to get over Buffy Summers, Angelus thought he did. He was making the efforts to move forward by fully committing to Cordelia and it had been fine for a few months then last night happened. He immediately spotted the familiar shade of golden long hair that tugged his heart. He thought he was seeing things, maybe finally having a mental break down by envisioning _her_ but he was not.

He knew he was not when she turned around and had the same look on her face as he.

The crashing waves of emotions he tried desperately to stuff into a box came back suddenly as soon as his eyes landed on her beautiful face. The undying love he had for her gave him an adrenaline rush as if for the first time in years he came back to life.

But then it happened.

The tall man with light brown hair and a shit-eating grin on his face knowing just how lucky he was to be standing beside a woman like Buffy Summers announced their engagement and Angelus' heart shattered into a million pieces.

It was his own fault that he let this happen. He knew she made numerous attempts to reconnect with him and rekindle whatever they had left; which had been purely based on their love. But he pushed her away and kept pushing her away until she finally stopped. Then he left.

* * *

Lifting his eyes up from the small photograph held between his index finger and thumb, Angelus looked around the large office. He easily picturing Buffy walking into the office unannounced with a tote bag over her shoulder and an iced coffee in hand.

Angelus looked over to the leather couch and sadly smiled remembering the times they'd make love on the floor behind the couch. If he wasn't mistaken, their son might have been conceived right here on the floor of the office.

He missed her so much it ached his chest. And now she was engaged to someone else. She's moved on with someone else and so did he. He was with Cordelia. Cordelia was gorgeous, funny, and intelligent with the ambition to rival his own but there was something missing with her.

Without realising it, Angelus was standing from the leather chair and heading towards the office door.

 **314 Gallery**

Angelus didn't have a clue what he was doing until he entered the upscale art gallery and he was standing face to face with his ex-wife, who appeared equally as confused to see him.

They stood in a large maroon coloured room surrounded by large paintings from Faith's new collection. She's been preparing the gallery for the highly anticipated exhibit and it gave her something to keep busy. She latched onto just about anything to make her stop thinking about Angelus for just a minute.

But there he was—standing in front of her with a look on his face she didn't recognise.

She watched as he clenched his jaw as he swallowed.

Against her will, her eyes ran over him. He looked the same; achingly handsome with his soulful eyes she could easily fall into, she wanted to run her fingers through his dark spiky hair like she's done a million times before or feel his muscular body that she knew so well, but there was something different about him, he appeared sadder.

"What are you doing here?" Buffy said, finding her voice.

Angelus stared at her. His eyes went to the small stack of business cards placed on a tall table which read; _Buffy Summers_. He felt a familiar stabbing pain in his chest, knowing that she had reverted back to her maiden name. In his mind and in his heart, he knew she was an O'Connor but according to the business card and the magazine articles he's since been reading about her for the at three years, they referred to her as _Buffy Summers_.

He swallowed then said, "I, uh, just wanted to make sure when you, uh, talk to… Cordelia," he forced himself to say her name, "could you not tell her about, uh… us… She doesn't know and I, uh, don't want her to find out that way."

Buffy stared at him unsure if it was rational of how angered she became for his _request_. Angelus got an idea of her anger with the way she pursed her lips together which exaggerated her cheekbones and pierced her glaring green eyes. It was a look he was accustomed to, especially at the end of their marriage.

"Is that it?" She asked impatiently.

"Buffy—"

"—You should go. _Cordelia_ will be here soon and since you don't want her to know about us… it would be _suspicious_ if she saw you here… talking to me… A person you're _not_ _supposed_ to know."

Angelus felt his own anger boiling in his chest and held his hands at his hips. "Hey, it's a simple request. And it's not like you've been completely honest with Captain America," Buffy rolled her eyes at his childish name calling, "so don't start getting on my back, 'cause you're not that innocent either."

Buffy paused unable to argue back. He was right, she never told Riley about Angelus or the tragedy of their son. She never discussed it to anyone except for Faith, who happened to catch one day her staring at a photograph she kept in her desk drawer. None of her friends ever brought up the subject of Angelus or Matthew. Her mother tried once and only once. Buffy closed herself off completely from the subject.

Snapping from her mind, Buffy looked up to see Angelus turning away, heading towards the gallery front door.

"Do you ever think about him…?" Buffy suddenly asked.

Angelus paused and looked back at her with a painful sadness she recognised written across his handsome features.

"… Matthew…? Do you think about him?" She asked. "I do," Buffy admitted. "I think about him constantly. I try to imagine what he would look like now and… God, he'd look so much like you. I think he would've been on the baseball team or something—He really loved baseball." Averting her eyes from his, Buffy looked down at her hands and took a deep breath then started to turn away, when Angelus' voice stopped her.

"I think about him every minute of the day."

Buffy looked at him.

Angelus stuffed his hands into the front pockets of his black trousers. "I think about 'what could've been' every minute of the day."

For three years, Buffy has waited to hear him admit that. She knew the answer but needed to hear it. He refused to talk about their son or think about him or react to his death for so long, Buffy knew he was not that callous. He was like her, unable to comprehend the pure agony which stabbed their chests.

With a slight nod, Buffy felt his eyes burning into her and said, "You should go, your _girlfriend_ will be here soon."

And just like that, Angelus was brought back to reality. He stood straight and nodded with agreement.

The feeling of a sledgehammer came back as she watched Angelus, once again, turn his back and walk away from her.

Refusing to shed any more tears for him, Buffy sucked in her emotions and continued to hang up the paintings waiting for Cordelia's arrival.

 **3 Years Ago**

 **Sunnydale, California**

 **O'Connor Residence**

Staring out the large front window in the living room watching the children in the neighbourhood play outside on the beautiful California summer day, Buffy released a deep breath.

She held a cup of hot coffee in her hand.

Buffy turned her attention to the French doors of the living room to see Angelus standing there at the entrance with a black leather duffle bag in hand.

Lifting her eyes from the duffle bag to his face, Angelus appeared menacingly serious but Buffy easily saw the weak determination in his eyes.

She wasn't surprised to see him standing there holding a duffle bag in hand. She knew it was only a matter of time, one of them would be standing there like this, waiting for the other to beg them to stay.

"I'm going to a hotel… one that's closer to the law firm. We have a big case coming up and…" he trailed off, knowing Buffy saw straight through his lie. He closed his mouth and stood straight. "It's for the best."

Buffy did not reply, only staring at him.

Without a word, Buffy turned her attention back to the neighbourhood children playing outside. The sounds of their laughter and playful fun were easily heard.

Angelus swallowed and turned away from her.

Keeping her eyes straight ahead, it was the sound of the front door closing that broke her finally.

Buffy's chin quivered and her eyes glazed as her heartbreak set in. Without a fight, she let the love of her life walk straight out the door.

Angered at her self, at Angelus, at the Powers That Be for taking their little boy from them, Buffy lashed out and threw the hot mug of coffee at the wall, letting it splash and shatter to the floor.

She covered her hands over her face and sobbed.

* * *

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	6. Chapter 5

**8 Years Ago**

 **Sunnydale, California**

 **The Bronze**

 _"_ _People living their lives for you on TV,_

 _They say they're better than you and you agree,_

 _He said, hold my calls from behind those cold brick walls,"_

The cute blonde haired singer sang into the microphone as she fingerpicked the steel string guitar. Her blue eyes tossed around the crowded club and smirked as she continued to sing:

 _"_ _Says, come here boy, there ain't nothing for free,_

 _Another doctor's bill, a lawyer's bill,_

 _Another cute cheap thrill,_

 _You know you love him if you put in your will,"_

In the back of the club, away from the people and nestled closely together in the booth were Buffy and Angelus. They were in the middle of a heated make-out session. Buffy's hands clutched around the back of his neck as she kissed him deeply, loving his taste which somehow always seemed spicy like cinnamon mixed with the Irish whisky's he's been drinking throughout the night.

Angelus grinned against her mouth. He's been in his first stable and long-term relationship in his entire life for a little more than nine months now and he was head over heels in love with this woman. He loved everything about her; her eyes, her voice, the perfect bountiful bounce of her long golden hair, her laugh, her smile, her quick wit, her creative and fast thinking mind, the way she'd ramble on and on whenever she was nervous. He was in love with Buffy Summers and he wanted the world to know it but more importantly, he wanted to remind her as often as possible.

Breaking the kiss, Angelus pushed the long strands of her hair behind her ear and looked at her with a small smile. "I love you."

Buffy melted inside unsure just how she snagged an insanely gorgeous man like Angelus and somehow gotten him to fall in love with her. "I love you," she pressed her hand against his cheek.

"If it weren't for all these people around us, I'd have you right here and now." He muttered into her ear.

Masking her blush with a playfully teasing look, Buffy whispered and gently bit his bottom lip, "Perhaps we should leave." Her smile widened, "No one will miss us. They're all busy dancing."

Running his hand down her arm to her hand, Angelus sweetly brought her hand to his lips and kissed her fingertips. "Let's get outta here."

With a grin, Buffy let him pull her up from the booth. She reached back to grab her pocketbook. They swiftly walked out of the club never seeing the laughing eye rolls from their friends, who noticed their departure.

They knew it was only a matter of time before Buffy and Angelus bailed on the night to only be together.

* * *

Pressing her back against the brick wall of _the_ _Bronze_ , Angelus' mouth was at her neck, nipping and kissing her skin. The scent of her feminine floral perfume sent him into a spiral of passionate desire. He wanted her— _needed_ her.

"Angel," Buffy let out a breathless gasp, wanting him just as much, "the car… We have to get to the car."

Her words fell on deaf ears as Angelus continued to manipulate her skin with his mouth.

"We'll go to my place if we can make it." She continued.

Angelus lifted his head and covered her mouth with his own. She pressed the front of her body against him. The tips of her fingers teased over the bulge at the front of his pants then slid her hand up the centre of his chest.

"Jesus, Buffy," he let out a gasp and clenched his jaw. "If you keep doing that, I may have to pull further into this alley."

With a dangerous glint set in her green eyes, Buffy ran the tips of her fingers over the front of his pants, tracing the outline of his strained cock and smirked, "Do it."

Matching the desire in her eyes, Angelus grabbed onto her hand and dragged her further into the deserted alley and rounded the corner to hide from any onlookers moving in and out of the popular nightclub.

A nearby streetlight illuminated a yellow light some ten yards away.

Angelus immediately pushed her against the brick wall and covered her mouth with his own. She moaned into the kiss and her hands moved wildly around his back. He pinned her against the wall and unconsciously rubbed his growing erection against her. The layers of clothing between them did nothing to hinder the desperate desire for one another.

Sliding his hands down her body, Angelus tightened his grip around the backs of her thighs and hoisted Buffy's legs up. She wrapped her legs around his waist and bucked against him, eager for any contact she could get. He rubbed himself against her, mimicking the actions to soon follow.

Buffy licked her tongue over his bottom lip and gently bit down until he moaned loudly. Meanwhile, he slid his hands up her short skirt; he was so thankful she wore. His fingers found her panties, which were damp in the crotch area.

Stroking her through the thin silk layer covering her entrance to him, Angelus opened his eyes and watched her carefully and she moved against his fingers. With a wolfish smile, he ripped the scrap material off and stuffed them into the pocket of his long leather jacket.

With a bit of creative manoeuvring, Buffy managed to unzip the front of his pants and tug his pants down just enough for his cock to spring free.

Playfully biting the tip of his chin, Buffy wrapped her hand around his standing cock and gave him a few long strokes. Angelus let out a groan, growing harder in her hand.

He couldn't wait anymore, there was a time and place when he greatly appreciated her foreplay but now was not it. He wanted her _immediately._

Covering her hand with his own, Angelus guided his cock to her centre. He chuckled as she moaned with frustration when he teased her slit before driving it home. Her arms tightened around his neck, her eyes squeeze closed, and a moan escaped when he filled her completely.

Her head fell back, falling to the waves of pleasure crashing through her. With determination not to lose control, Angelus gritted his teeth, trying his damnedest to hold out before letting his euphoric release come. Every time he was with Buffy, he wanted to draw out his pleasure as much as possible.

Easily proving she was more than a match for him, Angelus' determination to 'hold out' was quickly deteriorating as she moved her hips, thrusting back against him.

The only sound to be heard in the alley outside the nightclub was of two bodies slapping together and heavy breathing. Masking their moans, their mouths fused together, kissing passionately as their releases erupted—

 **Present-Day**

 **Angelus' Loft**

 **Master Bedroom**

—Angelus emptied himself with a groan, forcing himself not to groan his ex-wife's name.

For the entire duration of what Cordelia called, 'making love', Angelus' mind was on Buffy. It was always on Buffy. No matter whom he was with or how much he cared for the woman he was with, his mind was always on Buffy Summers.

He immediately pulled himself out of the warmth of Cordelia's body and moved off of her. His distraction was evident, Cordelia noticed. He wasn't a very 'talk about my feelings' type of person as it was but something was different about him. He seemed more cut off than usual.

She figured it perhaps had something to do with work. She noticed quickly in their relationship that he wasn't one to express his feelings. He wasn't the type to say, I love you. That was something Cordelia found as a flaw because she wanted to shout it from the rooftops, but more than that, she wanted to hear him say it.

Rolling onto her side, facing him as he stared up at the ceiling, with her index finger, Cordelia began to create nonsensical images over his muscular chest. "What are you thinking?" She asked.

 _About my ex-wife,_ Angelus replied in his mind.

Instead, he sucked in his guilt for laying with another woman, who wasn't Buffy and said with as much sincerity as possible, "All about you."

Just saying the words left a bitter taste in his mouth. Almost immediately, he turned his eyes away from her. None of this was of Cordelia's doing. She was good to him, worshipped him, he thought she might even be in love with him.

"You never asked me how the interview went today." Cordelia held her head in her hand and continued to create images on his chest.

If it couldn't get any worse for Angelus, now Cordelia wanted to _talk_ about his ex-wife. He knew what she was going to say; Buffy was great, interesting, funny, smart, everything he's known for forever. Cordelia was going to list everything he loved so much about Buffy and he had to lay here and pretend that it was only Cordelia Chase that occupied his mind.

"How did the interview go?" He asked much to his own disdain.

"Fabulously," Cordelia sat up in the bed, holding the bedsheet over her naked body. "Buffy is _so_ stylish. She really makes you like… _care_ about art. It's weird. Like… who cares about art but the way she talks about it… let's just say, her and Faith are a combination in a half!"

Angelus wanted to drown himself in a bottle of whisky, anything to numb the heartbreak in his chest.

"But…" The sudden solemnness in Cordelia's voice turned Angelus' attention, "… there's something about her…" Angelus looked at her, waiting anxiously for her to continue. "… There's something in her eyes… A sadness—As if something was missing." She thought for a moment and nodded with a new determination, "That's the story I wanna write."

"Maybe she doesn't want to talk about it. Whatever it is… maybe it's too painful for her to discuss."

"Probably, but luckily for me, I _always_ get the juicy details out of people." She started to move over him, ready for another round with her lover, "I _always_ get what I want. The skeletons in Buffy Summers' closet won't stay hidden for long." She began to kiss his neck and lowered her mouth down his chest, over his abs, pelvis, until finally reaching his limp cock.

Angelus stared at the ceiling knowing _exactly_ what Buffy was hiding.

Lowering his eyes to the woman sucking his length, Angelus closed his eyes for a moment then opened him. The woman looking up at him wasn't Cordelia anymore but a familiar pair of bright green eyes.

He watched as she continued to suck his cock and imagined it was Buffy's mouth wrapped around him.

* * *

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 ** _Song Used: "Who Will Save Your Soul" by Jewel 1995_**


	7. Chapter 6

**2 Days Later**

 **Afternoon**

 **Wolfram & Hart**

 **Angelus' Office**

Angelus wasn't sure how much more of this he could possibly take. Over and over again, he told himself that keeping his distance from _her_ was the best thing to do. She wanted to move on—she's _trying_ to move on and he vowed to stay away.

But hearing all about the 'tell-all' interview repeatedly every day was beginning to wear thin on him. Cordelia told him things about Buffy he never knew before. At one time he knew everything about her but this new version of his ex-was hard to recognise. It was difficult to listen to because more and more Angelus was realising just how far removed he was from her life.

Cordelia went on and on about Buffy's fiancé, Riley. The way Cordelia recited the conversation back to Angelus made it seem like Riley was Buffy's greatest love. It could be true for all Angelus knew but he didn't want to hear about it nor did he want to imagine her with someone else.

And then the bombshell happened, Cordelia had somehow talked Buffy into having a double date dinner with all of them… together… at the same restaurant… him, Cordelia, Riley, and Buffy… at one table… for an entire evening…

If it couldn't get any worse, now, Angelus had to endure an excruciating evening with his girlfriend, his secret ex-wife, and her current fiancé.

He debated whether to duck out of the night using work as an excuse. Perhaps he could hide out in the office for the of eternity and never show his face out in public again and thus, bypassing Buffy altogether.

The idea seemed like the perfect solution for a moment but then the intense desire inside of his body told him that he desperately needed to see Buffy.

The click of the door opening then closing tore Angelus from his conflicting thoughts.

He lifted up his dark eyes and failed to hide the look of shock written across his face when his gaze landed on the woman in question.

Buffy stood at the door with a purse hung on her shoulder and her hand wrapped around the doorknob, debating whether to run out or not. Her long golden hair hung around her shoulders and down her back in straight layers. She wore a lavender sleeveless top, form-fitting black trousers, and matching black heel boots.

Angelus stood from the chair unsure of how to react to her sudden appearance.

Standing in suffocating silence, neither of them knew what to say or what to do. There was an overwhelming sense of _tension_ but it went ignored as they stared at another, unsure who should make the first move.

"I should go," Buffy suddenly broke the thick silence. "I don't know what I'm doing here." Buffy wrapped her hand around the doorknob.

Quickly, Angelus moved around the desk and used his voice to stop her movements, "Wait."

Buffy paused and looked down at her hand wrapped around the doorknob, knowing that she should just leave like she's supposed to do.

Cautiously, Angelus took a few steps towards her, careful not to scare her off.

The closer he stepped towards her, the more powerful his senses tingled. His heart pounded in his chest, his stomach flip-flopped at the mere close proximity to her, his fingers begged to reach out and touch her.

Releasing the breath he's been holding in, Angelus said, "I miss you."

Buffy's next response was automatic like an unspoken accord between herself and Angelus.

She dropped the purse from her shoulder and closed the distance between them with a few short steps. Her hands wrapped around the back of his neck, crushing her mouth against his.

Immediately, they fell into the kiss and plunged their tongues into each other's mouths.

It felt as if no time between had passed, let alone three years since they've last kissed each other. Both of them knew their mouths perfectly, re-exploring every crevasse all over again.

Angelus hoped to the Powers That Be that this wasn't a cruel joke which had been played on him time and time again. But when his hands touched her back and slid down to her lower back and to her hips, he knew this was for real. He knew her body like the back of his hand, he knew her every curve.

Their passionate need for one another grew, overtaking any rational thought. His hands that were on her lower back, caressed her rear-end and fell to the backs of her thighs. Just like a hundred times before, he lifted her off of the ground and Buffy's legs instinctively wrapped around his waist.

Taking a step off balance, Angelus caught himself and slammed her back against the office door. The thud of her back meeting the door did not phase her as Buffy continued to kiss him desperately.

Her thin feminine fingers moved from his hair to cup his face. She broke the kiss in need for breath and lifted her eyes to his.

Angelus recognised that look in her usually welcoming green eyes. They were dark and hungry with need.

Keeping her pinned against the door, Angelus' let the tips of his fingers slowly slip up the hem of her sleeveless top, touching her skin, which burned to his touch. For so long he's been without touching her, feeling her against him, he missed her so much.

Ignoring the small voice in Buffy's mind, demanding her to stop, to think about Riley—sweet Riley, who was so good to her and loved her unconditionally.

Those thoughts went ignored as she gave in to her desires.

Her fingers went to the buttons of his black dress shirt. Amazingly, her fingers didn't shake as they unfastened each button, her body responded in a way of experience. Just like he's done in the past, Angelus fuelled her with a confidence she never realised she's been lacking for the last three years.

Kissing her mouth for a short moment, Angelus lifted her sleeveless top up her torso then tossed it aside. His dark eyes dropped the lace bra covering her breasts. Without thought, he leaned forward, resting his forehead against her and palmed her lace covered breasts.

Touching his muscular chest, Buffy wanted to cry. Her fingernails sensually dug into his skin until he moaned. He reached a hand between them and unfasten the button of her trousers as well as his own.

Their mouths fused together for another fiery kiss that would've made Buffy's knees buckle if she were standing.

He pulled her from the door and walked over to the couch across the large office.

This brown leather couch had seen them many of times. Cordelia had tried being spontaneous and surprise Angelus at his office but he easily rebuffed her efforts saying this wasn't the place or time. He couldn't bring himself to do be with someone else in a place that has seen many happy moments between himself and Buffy.

Laying her on her back, Angelus pushed down her trousers from her hips, along with her panties. His mouth went to her flat stomach and over her pelvis. He took a moment to revel in the taste of her golden skin and her natural scent that intoxicated his senses.

His hand covered her breast as his other hand caressed her damp centre. Buffy let out a gasp and her fingers dug into his dark hair and gently tugged it.

His mouth moved up her body, to her chest, her neck before finding her mouth.

Angelus swallowed her moan as she came to his fingers mercilessly caressing her centre.

Without breaking the kiss, Buffy's hands went to the unfastened button of the front of his trousers and unzipped the zipper. Her tongue licked the roof of his mouth as her hand snuck inside the front of his trousers and released his erected cock from its confinements.

Taking a moments pause, Angelus broke the kiss much to Buffy's dismay and sat up. He removed the open dress shirt from his shoulders and tossed it aside then tugged down his trousers. He kicked his legs until they were all of the ways off.

Buffy lifted her eyes to him and smirked, also sitting up. Angelus watched with a dark gaze as he removed the last article of clothing from her body.

She wrapped her hand around his girth, unable to stop the thoughts that compared him to Riley. They were both well-endowed, incredibly handsome, and wanted her immensely, but it was always Angelus in her mind. Despite all of the time that passed and water under their bridge, it's always been _him._

Silently, she gave him a few slow strokes, easily remembering everything he liked most. She then leaned forward and kissed the mushroom tip of his cock before taking him fully into her mouth. He tasted the same, felt the same, even the sounds that formed in his chest were the same.

Releasing her sucking hold over him, Buffy lifted her eyes to his.

Angelus understood her perfectly. Words weren't always necessary for him to read her mind but in turn, it was easy to forget that their lack of words is what drove them apart in the first place.

He cupped her cheek and pushed her long hair behind her ear. Angelus took her hand and gently guided her to her feet.

Buffy ran her hand over the side of his face and traced her index finger over his bottom lip, memorising every line of his handsome face.

Lowering his head, Angelus slowly kissed her heart-shaped mouth, wanting to savour every moment, every taste, listen to every breathless moan that would escape her perfectly shaped mouth.

Falling deeper into the slow kiss, that was hot and electrified their bodies, Angelus' arms wrapped around her and carefully laid her back down on the couch, settling himself between her legs; a position he wished he never had to remove himself from.

 **3 Years Ago**

 **ArtSquare Warehouse**

Working as an assistant curator at the art gallery which has given her start she needed for the last five years, Buffy was building her already lengthy resume by spearheading a huge night for the gallery.

After everything that has happened, Buffy threw herself into work and kept her eyes straight ahead.

In a matter of months, Buffy had lost everything. She went ahead and sold the house in Sunnydale much to Angelus' shock and a few days after that, Buffy served him divorce papers.

If he wanted to leave and move on without her?—Fine. Buffy was not going to wait around until he was ready to come back home, knowing full well that he probably wouldn't. So jumping before Angelus did, Buffy ripped off the band-aid and filed for divorce citing 'irreconcilable differences'. She wouldn't ask anything of him, she wanted nothing of his. Whatever she had or desperately wanted was now buried six feet under.

The gallery's front door flew wide open.

Buffy whirled around and met a pair of raging brown eyes.

"What the hell is this?" Angelus held up the blue folder containing the divorce papers then threw it down on a nearby table.

"What does it look like?—Divorce papers."

Angelus frowned, pinching his brows together. "You want a divorce?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Buffy easily matched his anger.

He stared at her. His chest heaved up and down trying to mask his heartbreak. More than anything, he wanted to fall down to his knees and beg her to take him back. He wanted to tell her over and over that he was a fool for walking away in the first place and to beg for her forgiveness.

"I thought—"

"—You thought what?" Buffy interrupted him. "That I'd let this… _separation_ drag on? By not doing this, Angel, we're going to keep running this same damn circle and I can't do that!" She shouted at him. "It hurts too much! Talking to you—Looking at you hurts _too much._ You're killing me." Her voice shook.

"Buffy…" his voice was low, almost pleading as he softly said her name.

She couldn't break down now. She needed to do this. Buffy _had_ to do this. "You left… All of this was inevitable. You started it and now I'm finishing it." She swallowed her emotion and masked a stone cold expression across her face. "We sign the papers and we stay away from each other."

It felt as if she stabbed a knife into his chest and twisted it with every word she spoke. _This isn't what I wanted._ He wasn't sure what he was doing but he knew, leaving Buffy completely wasn't it.

"… Given enough time that passes," Angelus lifted his eyes hearing her voice, "we should be able to… forget."

Angelus started at her believing with all of his heart that letting her have a few days to process what she was actually doing, Buffy would realise that she was making a mistake and she would take him back.

"I'm not signing the papers." Angelus grabbed the papers he had thrown down on a nearby table and placed back into the inside pocket of his suit coat and said, "I'm not giving you want you want." He turned away from her, ignoring the glaring look of anger set in her eyes. "… Not yet." He muttered to himself as he stormed back out of the gallery leaving Buffy dumbfounded and in pain.

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	8. Chapter 7

**Present-Day**

 **Later**

 **Wolfram & Hart**

 **Angelus' Office**

Laying nestled together behind the leather couch in the large office was Buffy and Angelus.

Angelus laid on his back with his eyes closed and an impish smile dancing across his mouth. For the first time in years, his body felt sated and relaxed. He could fall asleep right now if he could but he didn't want to. He wanted to savour every second of Buffy in his arms.

Her arms hugged across his torso and her head rested over his heart, listening to the gentle thumping of his heartbeat; It was an old pastime of hers.

Angelus buried his nose into her blonde hair and kissed the top of her head. He tightened his arm that was wrapped around her naked back.

Tilting her chin upwards, Angelus met her green eyes he loved so much and smirked. With his free hand and cupped her cheek and weaved his hands through her hair. It felt as if they never spent years apart or had any heartbreak between them. Their lips met in a soft kiss.

Reality began to set in when the sunlight from outside seeped between the closed curtains and sparkle over the diamond engagement ring that sat on her ring finger.

"I should go," Buffy said and started to remove herself from the safety of his arms.

"Buffy…" he started to protest as she got up and searched for her clothing.

Following her, Angelus accepted his trousers that she passed over and started to put them on. He watched her and hastened his movements before she finished dressing and walked out of the office.

"What was this?" Angelus asked as he zipped up his trousers.

Buffy released a breath and looked at him, "What this was… was me missing you. But that's over and now I have to try to live with myself."

"What does that mean?" He moved around the couch and stood in front of her and she adjusted her long locks.

"What that means is I cheated. I'm an adulterer—or a whore or whatever…"

Angelus shook his head hating the words coming out of her mouth. "Stop. You're not _any_ of those things."

Buffy looked at him, "Aren't I?—Aren't _you_?" She pursed her lips together and said, "I'm engaged to somebody else. I gave a promise to _somebody_ else."

Refusing to accept her words, Angelus tried to protest when she continued, "I have someone in my life now, Angel. That I love." The pain in his eyes wanted her to take back her words and pretend she never said them. "It's not what you and I had, it's different… You want to know what makes it different?—There's no pain. There's no water under the bridge." She swallowed her deafening guilt. "Angel, I _have_ to make this work. _I have to_."

Angelus let out a sharp breath and held his hands on his hips. "That's great—It's nice. You moved on. What'd you come here for?" He knew the words he'd say next were purely out of anger and heartache over the situation, he didn't mean them, but once they were said aloud, there was no going back. "One last go-around? Then rub in your great new life and _expect_ me to, what?—Congratulate you? _What do you want from me, Buffy?_ " He shouted at her in frustration. "Every time I see you, it cuts me up." He glared at her, heavily breathing. "Go home!"

Buffy did not move a muscle, all she could do was stare at him.

" _Go._ " He ordered.

Without another word, Buffy turned away from him and picked up her purse from the floor. She wrapped her hand around the doorknob and opened the door.

Angelus watched heartbroken as the office door softly closed. He let out the breath he had been holding in and fell back on the couch they had just made love on. He ran his hands through his hair and desperately wanted to pound his fists into something—anything.

 **Evening**

It had been several days since the _Orchard Archive_ art gallery exhibit and despite his best efforts, Riley had noticed something was incredibly off with his fiancée. It was even more obvious when she came home earlier in the afternoon to get ready for the double date dinner, he's actually been looking forward to.

Riley had no idea Buffy was beginning to unravel at the seams, but his suspicions were cast. He stood in the background and watched her carefully. She was unnervingly quiet. Her mind seemed elsewhere.

Even before all of this, every time he tried to bring up the subject of the wedding she'd get very quiet and tell him she didn't have the time or that she had someplace to be. He knew it was a line but he went along with it.

After some experience, he knew how long and hard it was to corner her. He knew there was something she was withholding from him. In honesty, he was afraid to find out what it was.

He didn't want to be the over-jealous or possessive type, but Riley failed to shake the feeling that something was terribly wrong.

 **Il Piacere Ristorante**

"… So," Cordelia got the conversation started using this dinner to her advantage as much as she could. "You have to tell us again how you and Riley met, Angelus, hasn't heard it, yet." Her hand rubbed up and down Angelus' arm.

Angelus' frown deepened and swallowed hard as she clung to him tightly.

"Buffy's mother, Joyce introduced us," Riley said with a smile and rested his arm around the back of Buffy's chair.

Buffy wanted to desperately hide under the table feeling the weight of Angelus' glare. Without him having to say a word, she could read his mind.

It would be unfair if Buffy were to say that Joyce didn't like Angelus. She liked him fine. Joyce liked the fact that Angelus really seemed to love her daughter, which was all that a mother could ask for. Even if they eloped and didn't tell her about it until days later. Joyce was happy because Buffy was happy.

What Joyce didn't like was how easily they seemed to stop living after the tragedy. She saw how Angelus pushed Buffy away and vice versa. Joyce had tried to put her two sense in but it was unwanted by either one of them.

She introduced Buffy to Riley in hopes that it would help her move on. To see her daughter living through the pain of losing her child and her husband in just one year was unbearable. But she never thought Buffy would marry her rebound.

"Almost instantly, I fell in love with her," Riley hugged her shoulders and kissed her temple. "But it took a little… finessing to get Buffy to feel the same."

"Oh, really?" Cordelia held her chin in her hand unable to mask the look of surprise. "Were you just playing hard to get?" She dropped her eyes to Buffy for a moment never registering the severity of her discomfort.

Riley smiled and turned his gaze across the table to Angelus. Angelus took a strange keen interest in the glass of Irish whisky in his hand, doing anything possible to avoid making eye contact with anyone at the table, especially Buffy.

Pinching his brows together, Riley noticed the way Buffy's eyes quickly glanced up to Angelus. Images replayed in her mind over and over the passionate afternoon they spent together. For the first time in a long time, she felt complete. Having his arms around her, his lips kissing her skin, the weight of his body over her, his cock filling her it all felt so right.

Reminding herself of where she was and whom she was with, Buffy her gaze turned away quickly hoping no one would notice.

Riley wasn't sure what he saw in his fiancée's eyes, to him it seemed like she was longing for the man sitting directly across from her.

As the conversation went on, Cordelia stayed oblivious to the pained expression on her lover's face or the look of discomfort that was clearly on Buffy's.

She was not as in-tune with her surroundings as Riley.

Putting his suspicions to the test, Riley took Buffy's hand which shifted her attention to him. He gave her a small smile and slowly leaned towards her and brushed his mouth against hers.

Buffy played the part of the 'adoring fiancée' perfectly and responded to his kiss appropriately, never confirming his loose suspicions.

Riley opened his eyes and glanced over at Cordelia, who was now cooing at the sheer adorableness of the couple, while Angelus stared at the whisky glass in his hand, never looking up.

"Have you set a date for the wedding yet?" Cordelia asked, looking directly at Buffy.

Buffy swallowed the sip of white wine in her hand and looked at the columnist like a deer caught in the headlights. "Excuse me?" She asked.

"I asked if you and Riley had set a date yet?"

Buffy struggled to find the answer to that loaded question. She tried desperately to ignore Angelus' eyes that were now fixed on her, wondering the same thing.

Riley stepped in and held his hand over Buffy's, "Not yet. Things are pretty hectic at the moment with the gallery…" he gestured his hand towards Cordelia, "… and your article… It's kind of taken the, uh… backseat in the scheme of things." The strain in Riley's voice was evident, enough where Cordelia did not press anymore on the subject.

Thankfully, Cordelia had stopped asking so many questions about the wedding, Buffy quickly glanced her eyes in the direction of Angelus. Masking her wandering eyes, Buffy turned her chin back to Riley and gave him a tender smile, a smile Angelus recognised.

"Since you're getting married, have you two thought about children?" Cordelia asked.

Buffy felt as if she couldn't catch a break. This was the dinner from Hell. It seemed the Powers That Be was purposely trying to make her miserable.

Buffy stared at the brunette really taken off guard by the sudden question. She knew it was Cordelia's job to pry into her life but Buffy couldn't help but wonder; _Why me?_

"Pardon?" Buffy's mouth bobbed up and down.

She couldn't even look in Angelus' direction, feeling his look of pain at the mere thought of Buffy carrying another man's child.

Riley on the other hand smiled, this was the sort of things he loved to talk about. He's spent hours upon hours imagining the family he'll have with Buffy. He saw at least five children in their near future. He preferred to start trying for children as soon as they were married.

"Oh, of course!" Riley grinned foolishly excited for the future prospect. "I think as soon as we're married we'll start."

Buffy turned her wide eyes at Riley, "Excuse me?"

Looking back at her, Riley smiled with a shrug, "Honey, we have to start soon if we want to have at least five."

"Five?… _Five_?" She released a breath and continued, "Riley—"

"—It's what we've discussed and agreed upon." He reminded her.

Buffy frowned still thrown by the idea of having another child, let alone having _five_ children. "Was I there for this conversation?—Because I don't remember agreeing to anything."

"You've always known this, Buf." Riley patted her hand that was on the table.

Stuck in a rut of utter disbelief, Buffy turned her gaze from Riley to across the table, landing on Angelus.

His dark eyes bore into her, trying to use everything inside of him to contain his anger. For the first time, Angelus realised it never once occurred to him that Buffy would have children again and with another man at that.

He wasn't sure which was worse, Buffy marrying another man or Buffy having another child with her new husband.

Buffy felt stuck. Oddly enough, it never occurred to her that, 'moving on,' getting remarried would come with the possibility of having a family. How in the world did she not see this coming?

In a panic of the entire new predicament she found herself in, Buffy's mind wandered and so did her eyes, and they were now fixed on a small family of three sitting across the restaurant.

The mother reached over to the child sitting between herself and her husband. She was cutting up the meatballs on the child's plate. Buffy watched the husband as he poured his wife another glass of wine and then run his hand through their child's hair.

"… Buffy?"

Riley's voice tore Buffy from her daze.

Angelus watched her avert her eyes from the small family across the restaurant to Riley. Angelus had known what she was thinking about as she watched that family. He noticed them as soon as they entered the restaurant.

"Sorry… what?" Buffy asked.

With a frown of frustration, Riley asked, "I asked if you ever wanted children?—'Cause you're acting like you don't."

"Now is not the time to discuss this, Riley," Buffy said, trying to steer the impending argument away by remaining calm.

Cordelia sat back in her chair and reached out for Angelus' hand. She tossed her eyes to him trying to telepathically say she didn't mean for this to happen but her thoughts were cut short when she noticed the look on Angelus' face.

His dark eyes were unblinkingly on Buffy. They were serious but appeared extremely pained. He looked at the blonde in a way Cordelia has never seen before.

"When is it the time, Buffy?" Riley began to raise his voice. "It seems like I'm always working on _your_ time. Doing things when _you_ want to do them. Do you even want to get married?"

"Riley, please keep your voice down." Buffy pleaded.

Riley shot up from his chair, "Is this entire relationship one giant lie?—Because I feel like I'm missing something and I don't know what it is because you won't talk to me!"

Angelus silently watched the argument recognising the words coming out Riley's mouth. He and Buffy had many similar arguments.

"Riley, please…"

Riley threw down the napkin that was on his lap and grabbed the blazer jacket on the back of the chair. "I'm sorry, Cordelia, Angelus, but I lost my appetite." He stormed out of the restaurant leaving Buffy at the table embarrassed for the scene that had just happened.

Cordelia felt terribly guilty for what she had unknowingly started. She tried to think of something—anything, then decided to get the check. "I'm going to track down the waiter for the check." She excused herself from the table leaving the secret ex-spouses.

Buffy felt his gaze on her, watching her every move, trying to get a read on her thoughts and emotions. She lifted her chin and looked at him, releasing a breath.

Without a word needing to be uttered, Angelus reached out his hand and placed it over hers.

She tightened her fingers around his, comforted and pained by his tender touch.

Meanwhile, Cordelia thanked the waiter for the speedy check and turned to face the table, only to be surprised by what she was seeing.

Angelus and Buffy sat silently at the table, with their hands conjoined together, staring longing at one another.

After all of this time, how could have Cordelia missed it? Clearly, there was something happening and she was just realising it. Buffy certainly tried to be the devoted fiancée to Riley, but now it was clear as day for Cordelia that it was all just a poor and heartbreaking act. Cordelia prided herself on being a good judge of character, very intuitive and observant but somehow she had missed what was in front of her completely.

She didn't know Buffy well, but Angelus… How could she not have seen it?

He was distant, he never tried to express his emotions, and he certainly never looked at her the way he was looking at Buffy.

How could she have possibly missed it?

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	9. Chapter 8

**8 Years Ago**

 **Sunnydale, California**

 **Buffy's Apartment**

It was a quiet and sunny Sunday afternoon.

Together, Buffy and Angelus sat on the couch in Buffy's modestly sized apartment. Angelus had moved in and thus to Sunnydale about a month ago. Not long after, Buffy told him that she was pregnant.

Receiving the news that he was going to be a father surprised him more than anything and for a split moment, he wondered if this baby was a good idea. But that thought only lasted a moment, as soon as his eyes landed on Buffy, he couldn't help but picture her carrying _his_ child. He was having a baby with the woman he loved.

He wondered if every day would be just like this, they'll sit on the couch; him reading the newspaper while she laid her head on his lap and flipped through the pages of a _Cosmo_ magazine. He imagined it would be a bit louder since a baby would be arriving eventually.

Tearing his eyes away from the home buyer section of the paper; he and Buffy have been looking for a house to build their family in. Angelus looked down at her and smirked toying with the loose strands of her blonde hair that fell from her messy bun. He revelled in the soft texture of her hair, he loved playing with her hair.

"Marry me," Angelus suddenly said.

Immediately, Buffy's eyes shifted from the magazine to his face. "W—What?" She sat up from his lap and looked at him.

Angelus smirked, loving the uncertain nervousness and disbelief in her voice.

"Marry me." He stated once more. "I want you to marry me."

Struggling to process his request, Buffy's mouth bobbed up and down like a moron. "Uh…" was all she managed to say, still trying to comprehend that this was a reality. "Is this about the baby?—Because we don't—"

Angelus held his finger to her lips halting any attempt to give him a way out of his sudden proposal, which came out more like a command than a question.

"—It's not about the baby. It's about me loving you." He took her hand into his own and looked down at her thin feminine fingers, "I've been wanting to ask you for a while now." Angelus lifted his eyes to her face. "You are the love of my life Buffy Summers—my one. Marry me."

A tear of happiness slipped from the corner of her eye and down her cheek. She held her hand against his cheek and leaned forward, nodding her head. Just before her lips touched him, she whispered a tearful, "Yes."

Angelus grinned into the kiss and buried his hand in her hair falling deeper into the kiss.

"I can't wait to marry you." Buffy smiled, twining her arms around his neck and slid across his lap.

"I'd marry you right now if I could." He nuzzled his nose against hers.

Buffy looked at him as an idea popped into her head. "Why don't we?"

"What?" He lifted his eyes from her mouth to meet her gaze.

"You're a fancy lawyer, you know a bunch of judges. Call one of them up and let's get married… right now."

"Right now?" He wondered if she was being serious.

Buffy nodded as she twirled the small hairs at the base of his neck around her finger. "Right now."

"Buffy…"

She held her fingertips over his lips, hushing his words. "Why wait? Let's do it. Then later after the baby is born we can have a big ceremony… or not, I don't care, I just wanna be your wife. Let's get married."

His heart pounded in his chest. To be honest, he felt exactly the same but he wouldn't've pushed her, figuring she'd want the big ceremony, with the dress, and her family and friends to attend. But he was just as excited and all for this wild idea of hers. He loved her spontaneity. She has always been much more outgoing than him.

Angelus smiled, "Hand me my phone on the coffee table."

Returning his smile, Buffy reached over to pick up the cellphone on the coffee table.

He quickly scrolled through the contacts for a moment knowing _exactly_ who to call, an old friend of his from University days named, Charles Gunn or simply, Gunn, if you were in his inner circle. Angelus happened to be in Gunn's inner circle and also, Gunn happens to be a judge.

He kept his eyes on Buffy as he listened to the ringing on the other line.

 _"_ _Hello?"_

Angelus smirked, "Gunn, it's Angelus, I've got an important favour to ask you and it has to be done immediately."

 _"_ _Yeah buddy, sure, shoot, man."_

The newly engaged couple shared a smile.

 **Present-Day**

 **3 Days Later**

 **Los Angeles, California**

 **314 Gallery**

He hasn't seen her since the catastrophic double-date dinner.

Angelus couldn't help but grow curious with notice of Cordelia. There was something happening to her. She disappeared into the _Composure_ office to begin writing the article on Buffy. Angelus was thankful for the break, it was getting nearly impossible to put on his 'committed boyfriend' performance for her. Every waking thought which entered his mind was on Buffy.

He needed to see her. He needed to know if she was all right.

* * *

Angelus took a deep breath and tried to summon up the courage to enter the art gallery's front door. He'd been standing outside of the brick building for almost fifteen minutes. If he didn't get it together soon, he had a feeling the coffee shop employees across the street would begin to get suspicious and call the police.

He didn't have a clue what he was going to say, perhaps finally fall to his knees and beg for her forgiveness for all of his mistakes and beg her to take him back.

 _She doesn't love you anymore._ He bitterly reminded himself. _She's moved on. She's engaged to… Riley—That bastard._

With that thought in mind, Angelus entered the quiet art gallery.

He looked around the silent building, noting that Buffy's assistant, Glory wasn't around, perhaps she went to lunch. Angelus checked his watch.

Grateful for the privacy, Angelus stepped further into the gallery. His ears perked to the sounds of objects falling to the ground followed by a familiar breathless voice grunting a series of curses.

Angelus couldn't help but smirk as he followed to where the crash happened.

He stood at the entrance of her modestly sized office.

One thought rattled through his mind as he ran his eyes over her. If it were possible she appeared even more beautiful than the last time he saw her, only three days before. Just like an old habit, Angelus' eyes ran over her body as she bent down, picking up the clipboard and the level-measuring ruler she had dropped.

She wore a long pale pink chiffon maxi skirt with a sleeveless purple ruffle blouse top. Her golden hair fell down her back in long straight layers

It took her almost a full minute to realise that she was not alone. A familiar tingle in the pit of her stomach swirled. There was only one person on this earth that could create that sort of sensation inside of her.

When Buffy turned, the surprise on her face was evident. She hadn't expected to see him. In an instant, there was an ache inside of her.

For what felt like a lifetime, neither of them said a word. They only stared at each other, seemingly trying to memorise every line on their faces, count every blink and every breath taken.

"I just wanted to see how you were." Angelus finally broke the tense silence between them.

"I'm fine." She told, still in disbelief that he was actually here.

The past week didn't seem real. That afternoon in his office four days before seemed like a dream she's had repeatedly for the last three years. Nothing felt real anymore.

"Good."

Another thick silence settled between them.

"I have to tell him." Buffy began and lifted her eyes to see his reaction.

Angelus stood quietly not needing her to tell him what she meant when she said, 'I have to tell him.'

With a slow nod, Angelus said, "If you think that's best." He hated this. He hated that Buffy wanted to tell her _fiancé_ something that was so personal and that was _theirs._ He never gave it any thought whether to tell Cordelia or not.

"He needs to know, Angel."

"I'm not arguing." With annoyance, he placed his hands on his hips.

"Yeah, not yet," she rolled her eyes, knowing him well enough to know that he was on the verge of arguing with her.

Angelus narrowed his eyes over and took a step closer to her. He tried desperately to ignore the familiar and intoxicating scent of her floral perfume. "Buffy…"

"… He has to know, please understand that." Buffy looked at him, determined not to think too hard about his close proximity to her.

Without thought, Angelus reached out and gently tucked the long strands of her hair behind her ear. His index finger traced the sharp line of her jaw. Buffy's hand wrapped around his and lifted her green eyes to his face.

Letting the magnetic force between them slowly drew them closer together. Angelus took a small step towards her.

Their lips drew closer, almost touching.

"Angel…" Buffy released a breathless whisper.

His desires took over a second later when his mouth crushed against hers.

The way Buffy responded to his kiss was like second nature. She opened her mouth wider letting him deepen the kiss with this tongue.

It felt good kissing him—it felt right. _No!_ The voice in her the back of her mind shouted at her. _You have to stop! You're engaged to Riley. You love Riley. Stop kissing Angel!_

His hands slid down her back and then clutched at her sides. All of the screaming thought in the back of her mind evaporated as soon as his hands tightened around her.

They passionately continued to kiss heatedly, pulling every bit of sensual pleasure they possibly could out from the kiss, knowing full well that they shouldn't. It was wrong.

Angelus pressed her against the front of his solid body and took a step backwards.

Buffy leaned against the edge of her desk, rattling the objects and desktop computer on the table top. Her hands ran up the front of his muscular chest and wrapped her arms around his neck. Her fingers threaded into his dark spiked hair while Angelus roamed her back.

 _"_ _Ahem."_

Buffy and Angelus broke their kiss and turned their heads to see Faith leaning against the open office door frame with her arms over her chest and an amused look slapped across her face.

Pushing her ex-husband away from her, Buffy freed herself and immediately grabbed Faith by her elbow leading her out of the office.

"Nice to meet you!" Faith said over her shoulder as Buffy escorted her far away from the office.

* * *

Releasing her hand from Faith, Buffy moved around the open area running her hands through her hair, distressed from the situation she was in. She's cheating on her fiancé. She was a horrible, _horrible_ person.

"What are you doing, B?" Faith asked, watching Buffy pace back and forth. "With Angelus—I'm guessing that's Angelus, 'cause it's definitely not Riley."

"That's Angel," Buffy confirmed, feeling the ramifications of her terrible slip with temptation; Angelus.

Faith slowly nodded her head, "He's a honey."

"Faith," Buffy's head shot up and a serious look was placed in her eyes. "Please… don't…"

Holding up her hands in defense, Faith said, "I wasn't gonna. But, uh, how long have you been…"

Releasing a deep breath, Buffy didn't want to answer the question. She knew saying it aloud would make her sound like a terrible, heartless human being for what she's been doing to Riley. She knew admitting that she was still completely in love with Angelus, despite being engaged to another man would make her sound weak.

At this moment, she couldn't take the judgement.

"I get it." Faith didn't need Buffy's explanation. She had a good idea what's been going on between the ex-lovers. She also knew Buffy well, she knew in time, Buffy will come to her—if she wanted to at all.

"I'll leave you to it then." Faith started for the gallery front door then turned back to her friend, "B," Buffy lifted her eyes to the brunette, "if and when you figure it out but want a soundboard… I'm here."

Thankful for Faith's non-judgement, Buffy nodded her head and tossed her a faint smile, "Thank you."

Faith nodded and walked out, leaving Buffy once again, alone with Angelus.

* * *

Buffy reentered her office and closed the door behind her, guaranteeing privacy. Angelus sat partially on the edge of the desk waiting patiently for her return.

Buffy ran her eyes over him and against all better judgement, she couldn't help but think how gorgeous he was, despite the look of uncertainty etched in his features.

Without uttering a word, Angelus pushed himself from the edge of the desk and moved across the room to her. He reached out and took her hand that was at her side. He looked down at her thin feminine fingers for a moment. Gently, he pulled her closer and with his free hand, he cupped her cheek.

He tenderly caressed her high cheekbone with the pad of his thumb and watched her pink lips part as a muted breath escaped her lungs.

Lowering his head closer, Angelus kept his gaze on her, watching her eyes close with anticipation. He wanted to kiss her. He wanted to kiss her every day for the rest of her life. His biggest regret was walking away and ultimately letting her go when he finally signed the divorce papers. He understood her reasonings. He failed her and she blamed him.

Inches from kissing her again, Angelus touched the tip of her chin. He knew he shouldn't. He knew to kiss her confused the hell out of him, but he just had to.

Before their lips could meet, Buffy's hand went around his and she pulled back, stepping away from him.

"What am I doing?" She asked herself then looked at Angelus with a fiery glare, "What are _you_ doing?"

"I don't know." He replied.

Buffy held her palm to her forehead and began to pace back and forth, "Kissing. We were almost kissing… _again._ " She turned to him. "Shame on you!" Buffy angrily scolded him.

"Whoa, what?" Angelus crossed his arms over his chest, "No, I'm not gonna take all the blame here, Buf. You were kissing me right back."

She ran her fingers through her long hair and rambled on, "Its like… an old habit. A bad— _bad_ habit. A habit to be broken."

"It's hard." Angelus agreed wanting nothing more than to

"No. No, not hard. Cold turkey. That's the key to quitting." Stressed out, Buffy began to pace back and forth again. "I can't do this."

Angelus hated the feeling of guilt she was internally battling with. "Buffy…"

"You left!" Buffy whirled around and shouted at him. "You walked out. You gave up and walked away! Now, I'm with somebody else!" Buffy moved around the office trying to make sense of everything. She finally looked at him once more and asked, "What are you even doing here?"

"I was trying to make things better."

They stared at each other in silence hearing the absurdity of his reply and began to laugh.

For the first time, since their child's death, Buffy and Angelus stood in the same room and shared a laugh together.

He looked at her with a smile, "It's going pretty well, don't you think?"

"Swell," she tossed him a sarcastic eye roll.

Feeling the tension between them slightly diffuse, Buffy sat down in a chair near the office window as Angelus leaned back down on the edge of the desk.

They regarded each other for a moment before Angelus broke the silence. "I couldn't leave it like that. At the restaurant…"

"It wasn't your fault," Buffy said, releasing a heavy breath. "I haven't been honest with Riley and he's starting to figure it out."

Angelus felt a familiar crack in his heart as he listened to her. She was still planning on being with Riley. After everything they've been through for the last week; they made love again, kissed senselessly not even fifteen minutes ago, and for the first time in a long time, they shared a laugh. And yet, Buffy was still planning on being with someone else who wasn't him.

Nodding his head slowly, Angelus knew he didn't have any more ties to her. He abdicated any rights to her heart the moment he walked out the door.

Angelus looked into her green eyes, wanting so much to beg for another chance but he knew, despite his wants and desires, he needed to put her first. He knew the only thing he could do that could assure her happiness is to let go of her completely.

"Then…" he found his voice again, "… you need to go to him and tell him the truth."

Buffy nodded, tears welling in her eyes.

"Perhaps not the _whole_ truth though," Angelus added. "Telling him about us… the _recent_ us—Telling him that we've... _been_ together would only hurt him. Don't let me ruin your happiness again."

Buffy lifted her gaze to him and smiled sadly, "You didn't ruin my happiness."

"I stopped fighting, Buffy." He admitted. "After Matthew… I gave up and just… stopped. Riley won't do that to you. For this new life of your to work—I mean, _really_ work then... we can't see each other anymore."

"You're right." She agreed.

Angelus stood up straight, just as Buffy got to her feet. She watched him head to the office door before he looked back at her just as he began to exit, "Goodbye, Buffy."

"Goodbye," Buffy told him softly.

For what felt like the hundredth time, Buffy watched Angelus walk away from her. A tear in her heart split in half as he disappeared.

Too tired of fighting the tears from spilling down her face, Buffy finally allowed them to fall. She hated herself. She hated that no matter how much she wanted it and how hard she tried to move on, she loved Angelus totally and completely. She hated that she allowed him to once again leave. She hated that she was engaged to a wonderful man, who adored her and would no doubt be sympathetic to her secrets.

 _Is this what I want?_ Buffy wondered.

 **2 Years Ago**

 **Sunnydale, California**

 **Restfield Cemetery**

It had been one year since the accident that took her son away.

Within a matter of months, everything in Buffy's life unravelled. She sold the house on Revello Drive, she filed to divorce the love of her life, and now she was struggling to pick up the pieces.

Recently, her mother introduced her to a man named, Riley Finn. He was sweet, with a kind and handsome face. He was totally opposite of Angelus, which Buffy wasn't sure if she liked or not.

What she did know is that though she liked Riley fine and she knew Riley was attracted to her it was all too soon. She wasn't even close to being ready to date again.

All thoughts relating to anything that cited as 'moving on' were pushed far into the back of her mind.

She stood alone at Matthew's grave for the last few hours. Lost in her own private grief, she didn't even notice the sunset or the warm air cool around her.

A dark figure stepped up beside her at the grave.

"I'm sorry I couldn't come sooner," Angelus said with a soft compassionate voice.

Buffy silently nodded and slipped her hand into his.

They stood at the grave, staring at the headstone that bore their child's name in silence.

* * *

They knew they shouldn't. They knew it would have only made it more difficult to part ways when it was time to say goodbye. But here they were, sitting against a large tree across from their son's grave. Buffy leaned comfortably in Angelus' arms, which were tightly wrapped around her, keeping her close.

Neither of them said much since his arrival. Not much needed to be said, both understanding perfectly how broken hearted they've felt.

Angelus buried his nose into her golden hair and closed his eyes as he breathed in the citrus scent.

They haven't spoken since Angelus stormed into the art gallery demanding Buffy to call off the divorce. He purposely stayed away in hopes it would give her time to come to her senses and see that he, in fact, _wanted_ to be with her and that he loved her more than anything.

He knew his faults. He was well aware how much he messed everything up when he left. He just needed a break. He needed a chance to breathe and regain himself again. In the throws of trying to forgive himself and his failures, he hurt the only woman he's ever loved by distancing himself from her but she just _had_ to know he loved her.

"It's going to be light soon," Buffy whispered looking up at the dark sky.

"This is the only place I want to be." He said into her hair and tightened his arms around her.

They sat in a silence for a long while until Buffy admitted, "I miss him."

Angelus stayed quiet and listened.

"Everyday I wake up with this… _hole_ in my chest. And I don't know what to do or how to fix it." Buffy said. "Everyone says in _time_ it'll get easier… but time's not the issue. I…" she hesitated, "… I don't know how to live in this world without _him_ in it."

Angelus didn't have a clue what to say. He was just as stuck at the same dead-end as her.

Without thought, Angelus softly pushed a piece of her blonde hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear.

Feeling raw and vulnerable, Buffy turned her eyes to him. Even after everything, the pain, heartache, the angered shouting words, she loved him desperately.

Unable to stop the magnetic forces between them, Buffy let herself be pulled closer until her lips touched his.

He immediately responded to her kiss. His intentions were to comfort her, but his desires seeped into their kiss as it intensified. Buffy's tongue caressed his lips, gently asking for entry, which he instantly granted.

Buffy wanted to cry as she kissed him. She hasn't kissed him in so long. His familiar spicy taste overwhelmed her senses.

In need of air, they broke the kiss, breathing hard and looking at one another.

Without thought, Buffy traced the pad of her thumb over the line of his bottom lip. "You should go."

Angelus was unable to hide the pain in his eyes. That was not the response he was hoping for.

Buffy knew how he felt, she felt it too. "We can't do this, Angel. Kissing you—even _seeing_ you… I can't take it. The pain is… _excruciating_ and I…" her voice trailed off trying to find a way to break it off for good. "What we had before… it's gone. We need a chance to move on. We have to stay away from each other."

Angelus felt as if the world moving in slow motion. He really thought that she would've come around and realised that she loved him and needed him—That they would work through the heartbreak of the tragedy together. He vowed to himself that he would be a changed man. That he would let her in and love her the way she needed and deserved.

But right before his eyes, it was all being taken away from him. All of his hopes were withering away to nothing and it was by his doing.

"I don't accept that." He finally said, keeping his arms firmly around her, knowing full well if he let her go, she'd disappear forever.

"You have to."

Her voice was small. Too small, Angelus noticed. With everything inside of him, he that she didn't want this any more than he did. "Buffy, please… _please,_ don't do this."

Buffy felt tears sting her eyes but tried desperately to hold them back. "You did this, Angel." She unravelled herself from his arms and got to her feet.

"No," Angelus stood up and watched her. Her eyes were anywhere else but on him, which gave him a hint of hope. "You can't even look at me. You don't want this." He reached out and brushed away her fallen tear with the back of his index finger. "We don't have to do this. We can start over."

"We… can't." She told him with a shaky firmness that did not convince Angelus.

Angelus reached out and clenched his hands around her upper arms and stared into her green eyes. "There has to be a way. Please, Buffy, there _has_ to."

"There is." Buffy focused her watery eyes on him and said, "Tell me you don't love me."

Angelus stood silently, letting his hands fall from her arms. He couldn't do it. How could he? She was the love of his life, his one. He couldn't lie to her, even if that lie could bring them back together.

Buffy took another step backwards and turned her back to him as she started towards her car parked outside the cemetery.

"You still my girl?" Angelus said, knowing he had to accept his defeat. She didn't want him anymore. She wanted out and he was going to free her.

Buffy paused mid-step and looked back at him and softly said, "Always."

Angelus wrapped his heart around her response, _'Always'._ It was all that he had now.

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	10. Chapter 9

**Present-Day**

 **Los Angeles, California**

 **Wolfram & Hart**

 **Angelus' Office**

To be completely honest, Angelus did not want to go back to the loft at this moment. Though they weren't living together, he knew Cordelia would probably be there. She had made it a point to throw as many unsubtle hints at Angelus of them moving in together.

Angelus was fed up. He couldn't take her loving gaze and her willingness to give him pleasure. Angelus also knew how much she wanted him to love her. But he couldn't, not in the way she deserved.

On the drive over to the office, Angelus decided that he was going to end things between himself and Cordelia. She deserved a better man than him. A man who wasn't broken and heartsick for another woman.

* * *

Unlocking the office door, Angelus entered the darkened room when he noticed a dim yellow light turned on at his desk.

He looked up and frowned with slight surprise, "Cordelia."

Cordelia sat behind his desk with an open manilla file and papers spread across the table top.

"What are you—" his words died on his lips when his eyes fell to the documents on the table.

She lifted her brown eyes to his. The beautiful brunette appeared livid, with a mixture of confusion and disgust. "What is this?" She held up a document.

Angelus did not respond.

"I'll tell you what this is…" Cordelia stood, still holding the document. "It's a marriage license. And _this_ marriage license has your name on it." She moved around the desk, "It took me a minute to realise who, ' _Liam'_ was but then I remembered you telling me some story about your mother nicknaming you ' _Angelus_ ' when you were a child. Mystery solved."

Angelus stayed silent.

"But the mystery isn't solved. _'Elizabeth Anne Summers.'_ That was a harder one to figure out. Who is this… _'Elizabeth Anne Summers'?_ " She crossed her arms, "That name didn't show up anywhere until the lightbulb went off and I had a hunch. So I did what any self-respecting journalist would do with such a feeling... I dug just a little deeper. ' _Elizabeth'_ is an old name. A name that dates all the way back to the _Old Testament._ So an old name like that would _clearly_ have a long, _long_ history in the world. ' _Elizabeth'_ has to have some sort of… nickname for it, right?" Cordelia smiled, "Right. There's 'Lizzie,' 'Liz,' 'Eliza,' 'Ella,' 'Beth,'… ' _Buffy'_ …" she looked at him with narrow eyes.

"' _Elizabeth Anne Summers'_ is Buffy, isn't it? You were married to Buffy, weren't you?"

Tightening his jaw, Angelus slowly nodded his head.

"It's so obvious now." She muttered. "Why didn't you say anything before? All of those times I talked on and on about her… Of how great she is… blah, blah, blah… Do you have any idea how stupid I feel? The entire time, you two knew something I didn't. You're the skeleton in her closet."

For the first time, Angelus found his voice again, "It's a little more complicated than that."

"How?" Cordelia asked. "Please, _enlighten_ me. I'm _dying_ to know about this _entire_ other life you've kept just so well hidden—Well, hidden until I started looking for it."

He had no choice. Against all his better judgement, he decided to tell her the truth.

"Let's start with, how long were you married for?" She asked.

"About five years," he listened to the gasp release from her lungs at his revelation. "But we dated for almost two years."

Cordelia arched her manicured brow then asked, "Do you love her?"

Angelus kept his eyes downward as he nodded his head.

"Then why did you divorce her?"

"She…" he began, "… divorced me."

He couldn't bring himself to look up but he knew Cordelia was surprised to hear his response.

"We… had a little boy. And there was an accident… He didn't…"

Cordelia stayed quiet as she listened unable to stop herself from feeling pain from his confession. She was angry and felt betrayed by his lack of honesty but she couldn't help but be sympathetic. No matter how angered she was, no one deserved the pain of losing a child.

"… I didn't know how to… work through the pain. Buffy tried to… _reconnect_ with me but I just… I kept pushing her as far away as possible until she finally stopped. When we weren't fighting, I kept myself hidden from her. I couldn't look into her eyes to see her disappointment… She blames me. And I can't fault her for that." He looked up at Cordelia, who was now letting quiet tears fall from her eyes. " _I_ blame me. I walked out. It's my fault that this happened."

"Angelus, no…" she shook her head with disagreement.

Angelus nodded, "It was my job to protect them. To protect my son— _My_ family and I failed. God," he ran a hand through his hair, "if I just reacted a half a second faster or—or stayed at the stop sign for another minute… I'd still have my wife and my son and… But I don't."

Cordelia watched him, realising just how much he burdened on himself. She wondered if Buffy even knew. She doubted it.

"With the snap of a finger, I've lost the only women I've ever loved and my little boy."

Her heart snapped in half. She knew he was capable of loving. Angelus had so much love inside of him but it would never be for her. It was clear now, Angelus would never love her.

"I'm sorry, Cordy." He told her with genuine sincerity. "I'm a broken man and you deserve so much better than me. You deserve a man who loves you with everything inside of him. It's not me." He painfully admitted.

"It'll always be _her_?"

Angelus swallowed with a small nod and said sadly, "She's my girl."

They stood in a stand-off silence. Neither knew what to say next. Angelus didn't plan on revealing so much of himself to her but it was now in the open and the weight seemed… lessened, though his heart still felt heavy.

"She loves you, you know." Cordelia suddenly said.

Angelus looked at her, taken back by her words. "She's... she's engaged to Riley. She's moved on."

"She hasn't moved on _that_ much," Cordelia smirked. "She may be trying by playing Riley's dutiful fiancée, but when she doesn't think anyone is looking, I saw her. The way she looks at you… It was a look of longing. I didn't realise what it was then. I thought maybe she was just attracted to you but… it's _painfully_ obvious now."

Angelus listened to her carefully.

Cordelia rolled her eyes, "I don't know why she's engaged to Riley when she is _still_ very much in love with you. Even more so, I don't understand why _you_ aren't _fighting_ for her?"

He frowned. "She doesn't want me. I let her go."

"Then get her back." Cordelia surprised herself with her own acceptance of the situation. "Go to her. Crawl on your hands and knees if you have to. Don't let her marry someone she's _not_ in love with just because you want her to 'move on.' Move on _together_. You only get to love someone with every bone in your body once— _Probably_ once…" They shared a small smile. "Go to her, Angelus. Instead of seeing her as your _ex,_ who's engaged to someone else, see her as just _Buffy_ , the woman you could never stop loving."

Angelus stood there frozen as he came to an easy decision. He lifted his eyes to her and gave her a sweet but impish smile, "He'll be a lucky man whoever gets you."

Sweetly, Cordelia smiled as she looked away at a poor attempt to hide her blush.

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	11. Chapter 10

**Los Angeles, California**

 **Buffy's Loft**

Buffy opened the front door of her loft and found Riley sitting on the couch waiting anxiously for her arrival.

"Buffy," he said with relief, worried that something had happened to her. When he arrived at the loft, she wasn't anywhere in sight. Because of his worry, he never thought that she could be at work.

After the scene at the restaurant, Riley took a sick day unable to do anything but feel the guilt for his ill-timed outburst.

"I am so sorry." He told her pleadingly. "The way I acted at the restaurant… it was wrong. The position I put you in. But," he slowly continued, "you have to realise that you've been…" Buffy waited for him to finish before she took on any defence, "… distant."

He lifted his blue eyes to her and shook his head, "I know what you're thinking, I'm being paranoid. But for the past week… Every time I try to bring up the wedding there is always some sort of _excuse_ to not start planning or you'd get this far-off look in your eyes. Do you even want to get married?"

Buffy broke her silence, "Of course I do. Why wouldn't I?"

"Most brides are so excited, it's all they think about."

"I'm not like most brides, Riley."

Riley nodded and took her hands, "I know that. And I love that about you."

"Then what's the problem?"

Clenching his jaw, Riley finally admitted, "The problem is that there is something going on and you're not telling me. You're not letting me in. This marriage isn't going to work if you keep shutting me out."

Buffy felt a sting in her heart, she shouted those exact words at Angelus during one of their heated arguments just before they separated.

"You're right." She said, much to Riley's genuine surprise. "I have been keeping something from you. I had my reasons. But, it's not fair to you and it will be difficult for you to understand. But you have a right to know."

Riley wasn't sure how to react to her admission. All he could do was swallow and hope she wasn't in love with someone else. "What is it?"

Buffy took his hand and led him through the large loft, into the master bedroom, and to the walk-in closet.

With a frown across his face, Riley folded his arms across his chest as he watched in silence as Buffy moved to the tips of her toes to reach up for a medium-sized brown moving box.

Riley watched as she carefully dug through the items in the box and took out a horizontal photograph. She stood up straight and handed her fiancé the photo.

Looking down at the photograph, Riley's frown deepened with confusion. It was of a grinning little boy. Riley guessed the boy was around the age of four or five years old. He had tousled brown hair, that had a slight curl to it as it hung carelessly over his forehead. The shape of the boys hazel eyes, Riley recognised. He also recognised the point of the boy's chin and lines of his sharp jawline.

With realisation, Riley lifted his eyes to Buffy's, then back down to the boy, and back at Buffy once more.

"His name is Matthew," Buffy revealed. "He had just turned four years old in that picture." She looked at Riley. "He's my son."

The shock on Riley's face was evident. Of all of the things, she could have said, that was the absolute last thing. "W—What?"

"He, um… There was an accident and he…" she struggled to get the words out but was unable to get them all the way out.

Riley didn't need her to finish. He lifted his eyes from the photo to Buffy and felt his heartbreak. "I'm so sorry." His mind was still reeling from the notion that Buffy was already a mother. "He… _Matthew_ looks a lot like you." Riley swallowed and look down at the photograph, "He has your eyes."

He tried to understand why she would've kept something like this from him. If they were planning on spending the rest of their lives together, shouldn't she have told him about this upfront?

"Were you, uh…" Riley struggled to finish the question, forcing himself to think about the other man that had been in her life at one point and gave her a child. "Was there… uh…"

"I was married." Buffy knew what he was trying to ask but couldn't bring himself to do so. "After the accident… we… divorced."

The crack of emotion in her voice did not escape Riley's notice. He wanted to know all about this 'other man' and more importantly, he wanted to know if Buffy still had feelings for him.

He then rationalised, if Buffy was still _so_ in love with her ex-husband that why would she be engaged to _him_? Why did she make love to _him_? Why did she tell him that she loved _him_?

It might be because he was slightly paranoid or even more insecure now that she's revealed this whole other life to him that he just _had_ to know.

"Are you still in love with your ex-hus—him?" Riley barely able to get the words out.

Buffy debated whether to tell him the truth or not in order to spare him from the pain of learning that she was still very much in love with her ex-husband. Or that she loved her ex-husband with every bone in her body.

"I'll always love him, Riley." She decided to be gently honest with him. She was also withholding the fact that in the last week she's slept with her ex-husband and shared electrifying-toe-curling kisses with him in the few days since then.

"Why now? Why are you telling me all of this now?" He felt there was a bigger reason for her suddenly letting him in. "What happened, Buffy?" Riley wanted the truth—the _entire_ truth.

"I've…" she fought with herself and forced herself to say, "… seen him recently."

The colour in Riley's face drained as she dropped yet, another bombshell. "You've seen who?—Your ex-husband?"

Buffy nodded, "We ran into each other."

"Here?" Riley pointed to the ground. "In Los Angeles?" He tried to piece together the events and how it all correlated together; she's been extremely distant for the last week, it suddenly it all came together. _The ex-husband_. Riley suspected since she 'ran into' her ex, she was trying to work through some old feelings again.

He grew serious and his entire body stiffened. "What happened?"

"Nothing," she lied and felt immediate guilt for it. Closing her eyes she then changed her reply to the half-truth, "We kissed. I'm sorry. It was an accident."

"An accident? You just what?—Tripped and fell on his lips? Make me understand Buffy why in the _hell_ you're going around kissing your ex-husband—that you've never thought to even tell me about in the first place?" His voice began to rise as his anger set in.

Buffy couldn't be angered with him. She knew he would struggle to understand all of this. It was her fault she kept this from him and now he felt betrayed.

"I don't know. It was a… mistake." She felt disgusted with guilt.

He sensed her hesitancy in her words. Riley wasn't sure just how much of a mistake she thought it was. When he asked her to marry him almost a year ago, her reply wasn't immediate. At the time he ignored it, she had always been cautious when making big decisions but he saw a flash of pain and glint of longing in her eyes. It only lasted for a moment then it went away.

When he first asked her out, years before, she had rejected him on numerous occasions. She stated that she had just gotten out of a relationship and needed to find herself again. It took one year and seven months until he finally took her on a date.

Riley noticed she always kept him at an arm's length but he blamed it on his paranoia that she held back with him. She kept her heart close, never letting anyone see it for too long. She rarely talked about her past or at least the last decade. He never thought much of it, actually, he found it a 'turn on' that she was so mysterious.

"I need you to be honest with me, Buffy."

"I am—"

"—I mean, _really_ honest with me."

Buffy nodded.

"I love you. I love you so much. All I've ever wanted is for you to love me back." He took a step closer to her and touched her cheek with his hand. "You're the woman of my dreams—the love of my life. You're my one, Buffy." Buffy's eyes snapped open, recognising the familiar proclamation. Suddenly, the voice in the back of Buffy's head gained volume as it shouted at her.

Riley's hand slid down to the point of her chin. Purely for his love for the woman standing before him, he'll get over her apparent kiss with her ex-husband and the fact she's been withholding this entire other life from him. He'll move on with her and hopefully start anew with _her_ at his side.

"Do you love me?" He finally asked. "Am I your one?"

Buffy looked directly into his eyes. She knew what she had to say. She knew it was the right thing to do. She knew that this was what she wanted. Her lips gently parted with a slight gasp.

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	12. Chapter 11

**Los Angeles, California**

 **Buffy's Loft**

 _Knock! Knock! Knock!_

Buffy crossed the loft to the front door.

When she opened the door, the visitor standing on her doorstep had taken her by surprise.

"What are you—"

Angelus never let her finish the question as he barged into the loft. He quickly looked around to see if they were alone.

Buffy closed the door and faced him, watching him with a high arched eyebrow, finding his behaviour peculiar. He seemed agitated, which was uncharacteristic of him. "What are you doing?" She placed her hands on her hips.

"Checking that we're alone." He said as he poked his head into the kitchen then stepped back around to stand in the living area.

"Angel," Buffy followed him with her eyes and released a breath of annoyance, "what are you doing here? And how do you know where I live?"

"Please," Angelus scoffed as he opened various closed doors down a hallway, "like I wouldn't know where you live."

Crossing her arms over her chest, Buffy pursed her lips together, " _Angel_." The firmness of her voice forced him to pause and look at her. "Why are you here?"

"Cordelia and I broke up," Angelus said as he continued to open the few closed doors around him.

Buffy looked at him with surprise and said, "Oh, that's um, interesting."

He whirled around to her. His brows low over his dark eyes, "No, it's not _interesting._ It's the complete opposite of interesting."

"Okay, fine, it's _not_ interesting." She huffed. "Why are you here then and why are you acting like a crazy man?"

"I need to talk to you."

"We've already talked. I remember you saying something like it was best that we never see each other again."

"Yeah, well… I think your gallery has a carbon monoxide leak or something, 'cause I wasn't thinking straight."

Buffy narrowed her eyes over him, trying to follow along. "Angel, what are you—"

Angelus took long strides across the loft heading back towards her when he said, "Buffy, I love you and that is the truth." His voice was firm and precise. "I've always loved you." He stepped closer to her. "You are the best thing to ever happen to me."

Buffy stared at him unsure how to react.

"And I ruined it. I let you go. I failed you. I let our son die and I… To see your disappointment—your hurt… I could never begrudge you for blaming me for Matthew. It was my fault. If I just—"

"—Shh…" Buffy held her fingers to his lips, hushing his words. "What are you talking about?" She asked him with genuine confusion and concern. "Are you saying that I blame you for the accident? Angel, how could you even think that?—Of course I don't blame you." Her hand cupped the side of his face, "Honey, it wasn't your fault. _None_ of that is your fault. Is that why you left?—Because you thought I blamed you for the accident?"

Angelus swallowed and leaned into her palm that cupped his cheek unable to find his voice.

"I never—not for one-second had ever blamed you." Unconsciously, the pad of her thumb slid over his bottom lip. "I thought you stopped loving me." She told him with a meek voice that instantly broke Angelus' heart. "Neither of us knew how to… deal with the accident. I know I didn't. We just kept… pushing each other away. And then you left—"

"—I never should have left you."

"But you did. I thought you've had enough of me—That you couldn't stand to look at me anymore because of the accident. That's why I went ahead with the divorce. It was hard enough to endure your rejection so I—"

"—Broke it off before I could." Angelus finished and watched her nod. "I'm a coward. I'm so sorry for what I put you through."

In an instant, Buffy forgave him. She forgave him for everything; the arguments, the distance, him leaving her—everything she forgave. Of course, she forgave him, she loved him.

"It wasn't just you. I stopped trying too. We're both to blame." She looked at him.

By the love shining in his dark eyes, Buffy knew that he had forgiven her.

She suddenly released a small chuckle. "Communication has never been our strong suit has it?" Buffy asked.

Angelus smirked then said, "Don't marry Riley."

Buffy lifted her eyes to him. "Angel…"

"Please, don't marry him. Come back to me. Marry me. Let's be together just like how we were always meant to." He reached out and took her hands then brought them to his lips, kissing her knuckles. "I'm doing what I've should've done years ago... I'm fighting for us, Buffy. Whatever happens next… I want to work through it together—with you. We shouldn't've dealt with Matthew's death alone. We've always been stronger together. Our love is so strong." His dark pleading eyes bore into hers. "Don't give up on me. Love me, Buffy."

She stood quietly for what seemed lifetimes. Her eyes looked down at their conjoined hands when she noticed a shine on his ring finger. Without a word uttered, she lifted his left hand higher to inspect the ring and gently touched it. On the ring finger of his left hand, he wore the Claddagh ring which had always symbolised their love. She took her time memorising every delicate curve of the thin silver ring. She brought his hand closer to her mouth and tenderly brushed her lips over the ring.

Angelus released a breath.

Buffy lifted her chin to look up at him. "I've always loved you." She told him. "Right from the start. I tried to move on. I really did." Her blunt honesty felt like another stab wound in his heart. "I tried to love another man— _marry_ another man to erase you and… it didn't work. I can fool everyone; my family, my friends… you but, I can't fool myself."

Angelus felt his heart slowly rise from the pit of his stomach though he was afraid of what she'll say next.

"I gave you my heart so long ago, Angel, and I never I got it back." Her fingers touched his chin as her other hand was still laced in his. "I love you." With a slight shrug, she said, "I'm your girl."

Unable to hold back for another second, Angelus' mouth crushed against hers. He pulled her into his chest and his arms wrapped around her back. Buffy pressed her front against his and twined her arms around his neck, opening her mouth wider for him to deepen the kiss.

For the first time in years, the dark cloud that had been hanging over their heads suddenly disappeared. A weight had been lifted from their shoulders.

Angelus broke the kiss and panted with a look of concern across his features. "What about Riley?"

"I couldn't…" Buffy began, "… He deserves someone who can love him in every way like how I love you. I ended the engagement."

Nodding to her response, Angelus touched his forehead to hers and closed his eyes letting his mind engrave her perfume scent into his membrane. "What does this mean for us?" He needed to hear her say it.

"It means…" Buffy's hands went around the back of his neck then her fingers buried into his dark hair, "… that we're done being stupid. It means, no matter what, we're gonna to stick together. No more running. No more pushing each other away. This is for good."

Angelus yearned for this moment to come; when he and Buffy stopped acting foolishly and be together as they've always meant to be. He hasn't felt this happy in a long, _long_ time. After the everything that had made them separate and her rejection of his efforts, Angelus never allowed himself to truly believe they'd never reunite.

He ran his hand through her long hair, blissfully falling in love with her all over again.

Unable to resist each other a moment longer, they soon themselves kissing passionately. After being apart for so long and the darkness that always seemed to loom over them after the accident, the desire for each other was evident.

Their passionate encounter days before had been a bit sordid and forbidden but now, they were free.

Touching their foreheads against each other, they looked one another in the eye as they caught their breath.

A slow smile crossed their mouths.

Finally, something good happened.

Angelus hoisted her up as if she only weighed a feather. Buffy's legs wrapped around his waist and cupped the back of his head with her hands. They shared a few light kisses as he walked them towards the back hall, where the master bedroom was located.

His hands that were holding the back of her thighs slid to her rear-end. Buffy let out a giggling yelp when his hands clenched her bottom. She nuzzled her nose against his then covered his mouth with her own.

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	13. Chapter 12

**Later**

 **Los Angeles, California**

 **Buffy's Loft**

Laying blissfully and exhaustedly in each other arms, Angelus tightened his arms wrapped around Buffy's naked back and kissed her hair then laid his cheek over the top of her head.

Buffy closed her eyes and released a deep breath. It had been so long since she's felt this relaxed. The deadweight of the guilt, the pain, and utter heartbreak that had been looming over her like a dark shadow lifted and evaporated.

A playful smile tugged at her lips and she began to lightly kiss the centre of his chest up to his collarbone.

Angelus let out a laugh and opened his eyes, "What? You couldn't possibly—Not that I wouldn't…"

Buffy snorted a chuckle and looked at him, resting her chin over the back of her hand that was on his chest. "No, no, I'm spent. Pleasantly numb even." She moved her hand that was on his chest and caressed the side of his face, "I just missed kissing you whenever I want."

Tucking her long hair behind her ear, Angelus took her hand that touched his face and kissed her fingertips. "You'll never have to miss kissing me whenever you want again."

With that wonderful thought in mind, Buffy rested her head on his chest, listening to the soft beat of his heart. "I'm so sleepy."

Gently rubbing his hand over her back, Angelus smirked and whispered, "Sleep."

"No," she frowned though her eyes were closed, "I want to stay awake." Buffy tilted up her chin and looked at him, "So this day can keep happening."

Kissing her forehead, Angelus brought her hand he held to his mouth and kissed the centre of her palm. "We'll make another one like it tomorrow… and the next day, and the next day for the rest of our lives." He brushed his mouth against hers. "Forever, that's the whole point."

Buffy smiled dreamily for a moment, closing her eyes soothed by his velvet voice whispering her promises of an everlasting love.

After a moment, Buffy frowned and pinched her brows together and asked, "Have you always been this much of a sweet-talker?"

"It's one of the things you said you've always loved about me." Angelus dropped his gaze down to her.

Buffy looked at him with raised sceptical brows, "Really? Those lines really worked?"

"It got you in this bed didn't it?" He smirked.

With a pause, Buffy thought for a moment about it and realised that he has served her many knee-weakening lines throughout their entire relationship and she fell for each and every one of them—even the ultra cheesy ones.

"What you think you can just…" she swallowed falling into his hypnotic gaze, "look at me with those dark, penetrating eyes," her voice faltered, "and say we'll be together forever sort of stuff and I'll just…" she suddenly lost her train of thought as she fell into the depths of his chocolate brown eyes.

"You'll just what?" He knew what was happening and was unable to suppress his smile.

Buffy opened her mouth and let out a soft sigh, "Huh? Were we talking?"

He licked his lips and shook his head, "No, I was just about to kiss you."

"Oh, good," Buffy said and returned his widening smile as he drew her closer until their lips touched.

They smiled into their kiss and deepened it as another wave of desire washed over them. She shifted to lay over him, straddling his waist letting the thin bedsheet that covered their naked bodies fall. Angelus ran his hands up and down her naked back then buried a hand into her blonde hair.

Taking her by surprise, he rolled her over onto her back and continued to kiss her passionately.

Buffy wrapped her arms around his neck and ran her hands wildly over his back.

They took a moment's pause to catch their breaths. Angelus nuzzled his nose against hers and engraved the heated look in her green eyes into his membrane.

This was it. Nothing would ever tear them apart again. Angelus was determined to keep her with him as long as possible for the rest of their lives. The first thing—second thing he was determined to do was to make her his wife again and change her maiden name. She was an O'Connor plan and simple and in the morning he'll give Gunn another call asking for a favour.

 **Epilogue**

It had been seven years since Buffy and Angelus found each other again. Just like the first time, they quickly remarried then earned a long lecture from Buffy's mother about having another wedding without her present. Two months later, they granted Joyce's wish for a wedding ceremony and a reception with all of the traditions nestled in-between.

Every day Buffy and Angelus had to work at their relationship but they were in a happier place. The pain of losing their child still lingered deep in their hearts but together the pain had gotten somewhat easier to manage but it would never go away. They loved each other to no end and tried their damnedest to fix all of the mistakes that had broken them apart.

They decided to not live in Sunnydale, and instead found a beautiful craftsman style home on the outskirts of Los Angeles which also happened to be conveniently close to their work.

After the release of Cordelia's _Composure_ article, she had graciously refrained from airing out Buffy's dirty laundry to the entire world and instead praised the blonde for her high fashion sense, work ethic, and impeccable taste in art. Cordelia had briefly mentioned tidbits about Buffy's personal life, but nothing about the child she lost or her divorce, instead, much to both Buffy and Angelus' surprise, Cordelia had said, Buffy was happily married.

Buffy's gallery became a household name overnight. It had also become the main venue for various fashion photoshoots and a prime set location for television and film productions.

About six months after remarrying her love and the release of the article, Buffy apprehensively announced that she was pregnant.

They had talked about having children again once before and brushed it off as something that _could_ happen but it wouldn't be the end of the world. But secretly they wanted children desperately.

Nine months later, they welcomed a little boy into the world. He was born on a sunny Friday afternoon. Newborn Liam, weighed eight pounds and three ounces and was twenty-one inches long.

The new parents never thought they'd ever feel so much joy in their lives again.

 **7 Years Later  
**

 **Sunnydale, California**

 **Restfield Cemetery**

Buffy stood at the headstone that bore her child's name. She released a deep breath as the memories of her young son running around and the sound of his little laugh echoed in her mind. A small smile tugged at her mouth cherishing the memories she had of him.

She took a small step and leaned forward placing a round stone from her pocket over the top of the granite headstone. Tenderly, her fingers brushed over her son's name feeling her heart grow with love and heartache.

"I love you, sweetie," Buffy whispered.

Standing up tall again, Buffy's ears flinched at the sound of squeaky voices chatting behind her.

She looked over her shoulder and smiled softly as her seven-year-old boy, Liam walked beside Angelus. He had a tiny baseball mitt over his little hand and a ball in the other. Liam was the perfect mixture of herself and Angelus, but much like Matthew had, Liam, bore Angelus' dark features.

In Angelus' arms, he carried their five-year-old daughter, Katie.

Katie began to wiggle out from Angelus' arms as soon as her hazel green eyes landed on Buffy just ahead on top of the small hill.

Angelus placed the girl down onto her little feet and she took off after Buffy.

* * *

Katie wrapped her arms around Buffy's waist and tilted her little-pointed chin up to her. Buffy looked down with a small half smile and pushed Katie's dark blonde hair from her face.

"Do you want to put a stone down?" Buffy asked the girl.

Katie's eyes brightened at the task and dug her hand into her coat pocket. "Daddy helped me."

"That's a good stone." She ran her fingers lovingly through Katie's long hair. "Go put it on top."

Buffy watched as the five-year-old carefully walk over the grass and reached up to place a stone beside Buffy's.

"… Is Matty a _Dodgers_ fan too, Dad?"

Buffy's heart skipped a beat. Ever since Buffy and Angelus had told Liam about his older brother months before, Liam had taken to calling him 'Matty.' Buffy never dared questioned it, figuring it was her son's way of connecting with his big brother.

"You bet he is." Angelus gave Liam a tugging smile and patted his back. "Go put the glove down."

The seven-year-old walked over the grass and kneeled down at the headstone. He took the baseball mitt from his hand and placed it down on the grass beside a pot of flowers. Katie walked over to Liam and crouched down beside him, watching the small ceremony.

"Dad says that you're a baseball fan. Me too! We got you the coolest _Dodgers_ baseball mitt! See it has the _Dodgers_ logo and everything!" Liam paused for a moment then said, "My favourite player is Justin Turner! He throws the ball good…" Liam frowned and looked back at his parents standing at the foot of the grave with their arms wrapped around each other. "Are you _sure_ he can hear me?" He asked sceptically.

"I don't know," Buffy told him honestly. "Maybe. I like to think he does."

Liam considered her words for a moment and shrugged, "I like to think he does, too."

"I like _Dodgers_!" Katie suddenly chimed in wanting to be apart of the exchange. "I wanna talk to Matty!"

Liam turned his dark eyes over to Katie and cocked a highbrow. "You don't know _Dodgers_."

"Yea-huh!" Katie pouted her bottom lip in a way that was identical to her mother's infamous pout.

"You're too young." He titled his head to the side giving his little sister a knowing look that made Buffy and Angelus chuckle in the background.

Katie's pout deepened and her arms crossed over her little chest, " _You're_ too young."

Liam rolled his eyes, "Matty, you have _no_ idea how annoying little sisters are."

" _Mom!_ " Katie glared at her brother. "Liam is telling Matty I'm annoying! He's annoying!"

Trying to keep the smile from her mouth, Buffy tossed her children a warning glare which didn't need to be backed with any words.

The siblings immediately stopped their argument and looked back at the headstone continuing the baseball conversation.

Angelus tightened his arm that was wrapped around Buffy's shoulders. He pressed his mouth against the side of her head. She laid her head over his chest and hugged her arms which circled his waist.

There was a major missing piece in their idyllic life but for what they had, they cherished and protected every single moment of it. There was no longer a shadow on the sun, the world seemed just a little bit brighter and a little more hopeful.

 **END.**

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	14. Author's Note 2

**Author's Note:**

Hey,

That's a wrap!

The story felt like it came to a natural end and it wouldn't've been right if it kept being pushed, you know?

I hope you enjoyed the story, believe it or not, this was challenging to write, which made the process a whole lotta fun!

Anyways... if you have prompts but don't have the time to write them or unsure how to write them or just wanna see if I'd write it DM me. I'd love to hear your ideas and you never know, maybe something super cool will come out of it!

 **Peace and Love,**

 _ **P.S. Leave a review! I value your opinion!**_

 _ **P.S.S. Fun Fact: For those wondering,**_ ** _"Shadow on the Sun"_** _ ** ** _is a song by Audioslave, 2002_****_

 _ **P.S.S.S. I swear I didn't forget about my unfinished stories...!**_


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